tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2176071389341926182024-03-12T21:35:05.159-07:00Heidi Below Zero<i>Queer romance and erotica author <b>Heidi Heloise Belleau</b> talks writing, reading, and really cold weather.</i>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.comBlogger123125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-65725134250125124902015-05-29T16:55:00.003-07:002015-05-29T16:56:07.031-07:00Read and Write With Pride @ Audreys Books<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Mark your calendars! I'll be doing a reading from WALLFLOWER at my local independent bookstore, along with six other talented LGBT writers from Edmonton, Alberta and area. There'll be free food and books to sign, and I'd love to see you there!</div>
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<a href="https://www.facebook.com/events/1441437006158667/">Read and Write With Pride</a><br />
June 9th, 7pm<br />
Audreys Books<br />
10702 Jasper Avenue<br />
Edmonton, Alberta<br />
T5J 3J5<br />
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Read and write with pride! Join Audreys books and 7 local LGBT writers on June 9th at 7pm for an evening of storytelling, memoir, and poetry. Authors Rob Browatzke, Alex Powell, Heidi Belleau, and Sheldon L’Henaff will read aloud excerpts of their fiction featuring gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender characters: stories of romance, sex, kidnapping, and coming of age that will take you from Wonderland to the battlefields of WWII, from the halls of a high school in Saskatchewan to a glitzy Vancouver art gallery. Marc Colbourne will share the gripping true story of Arsham Parsi, an Iranian queer activist who came to Canada to escape persecution, and poets Marina Reid Hale and Laurie Macfayden will delight you with their personal, political, and always engrossing verse.<br />
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After the reading, the panel as well as Audreys’ knowledgable staff will be on hand to answer all your questions about LGBT lit, whether you’re looking for more to read or interested in creating or publishing your own works. With more ways than ever to share our stories, reading and writing with pride has never been more achievable . . . or enjoyable!<br />
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Author signing and light refreshments to follow. This event is free to attend!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjn8_7k8Rzb8GcOwMibrxvKN84G1uEEAZUKZ0neVMvYBiEkMvgflhRClbJOKpK47ZvMtE1Oas_SWTDRzvqVxBo6cD6cLsW3wdx-Nf_BVIwhKy0mGA6pQGEFkKlWi_aS9kXnD0cPJHmGDz0/s1600/image3161-2.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjn8_7k8Rzb8GcOwMibrxvKN84G1uEEAZUKZ0neVMvYBiEkMvgflhRClbJOKpK47ZvMtE1Oas_SWTDRzvqVxBo6cD6cLsW3wdx-Nf_BVIwhKy0mGA6pQGEFkKlWi_aS9kXnD0cPJHmGDz0/s1600/image3161-2.gif" /></a></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-31555903928453274782014-09-30T17:31:00.001-07:002014-09-30T20:46:24.897-07:00Rear Entrance Video Character Art!Long time no see! (And no . . . website update! Uh. Sorry. I'm getting to that.)<br />
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Today I'm here with some amazing character art I commissioned of the <a href="http://riptidepublishing.com/titles/universe/rear-entrance-video">Rear Entrance Video</a> boys! <a href="http://helloimjustyna.tumblr.com/">Justyna Wycislak</a> is an artist I've enjoyed and followed on tumblr for quite awhile, so I asked her if she'd like to do some amazing art of the boys! I'm absolutely in love with what she came up with and I'm planning on making some adorable swag of her art for GRL this year.<br />
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Did I mention <a href="https://gayromlit.com/">I'm going to GRL this year</a>? Yaaaay! I've never been to Chicago before so I'm absolutely stoked! I'll be at the signing as a Featured Author for the first time, and I'm also on a New Adult panel with two authors I very much admire, Anne Tenino and Jessica Freely. Can't wait!<br />
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But this is supposed to be a post about art, not GRL! So without further adieu . . .<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEZ5hE95GcROmyNcabcsReg_Xu_7_88nWL43nwj8AfuGzouLfI3-OHYkQieJlPslrcCh01NuGqM0FBuPjSZmf_5I4J0SeKif_y2dpv1iaSpRZc6Xds2QgvffMd_qd_ScaVbQ7KjpjJpoI/s1600/rev1+christian.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEZ5hE95GcROmyNcabcsReg_Xu_7_88nWL43nwj8AfuGzouLfI3-OHYkQieJlPslrcCh01NuGqM0FBuPjSZmf_5I4J0SeKif_y2dpv1iaSpRZc6Xds2QgvffMd_qd_ScaVbQ7KjpjJpoI/s1600/rev1+christian.jpg" height="320" width="261" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTbsRuNy9btN-1enDFLW5QRMfwAR-arL61jdb0mqU1pnO6YXIUovMSJuQjTW3swkF3d8uVJTUJvwkSdK9qhfmDYZhSRyH2zhB2HUi7DNyIYqedZvB9JRo95rDS0ZLw1lFR-k5bNIAWR_M/s1600/rev1+max.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTbsRuNy9btN-1enDFLW5QRMfwAR-arL61jdb0mqU1pnO6YXIUovMSJuQjTW3swkF3d8uVJTUJvwkSdK9qhfmDYZhSRyH2zhB2HUi7DNyIYqedZvB9JRo95rDS0ZLw1lFR-k5bNIAWR_M/s1600/rev1+max.jpg" height="320" width="261" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9Rsklm7pxISWfcU37USqsqXUvAUEjfawmwWtQ3F5xIF8ODBhoHQ54w-9kyHppy-hdNA9vzvu_E1cuU_YRFI89Rm-Np6ovmJHDyyfdYuHBtCCFxZATqy5eKTjfbWV57sbnKocZFYqJbCA/s1600/rev1+rob.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9Rsklm7pxISWfcU37USqsqXUvAUEjfawmwWtQ3F5xIF8ODBhoHQ54w-9kyHppy-hdNA9vzvu_E1cuU_YRFI89Rm-Np6ovmJHDyyfdYuHBtCCFxZATqy5eKTjfbWV57sbnKocZFYqJbCA/s1600/rev1+rob.jpg" height="320" width="261" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEDEr-LeYHCJFGlLMw335dQB3UVgW7Q6ENXDPBvg4z2KQVK8b_SMohdRjm6DLcmUdVyzVL9CP10jhnEkrNgHXlF3w1VGWfc1NJjTiLvzIR1cQY1pmDkPd7SKPVoleDJBCw-VAH-WDbiVk/s1600/rev1+dylan.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEDEr-LeYHCJFGlLMw335dQB3UVgW7Q6ENXDPBvg4z2KQVK8b_SMohdRjm6DLcmUdVyzVL9CP10jhnEkrNgHXlF3w1VGWfc1NJjTiLvzIR1cQY1pmDkPd7SKPVoleDJBCw-VAH-WDbiVk/s1600/rev1+dylan.jpg" height="320" width="261" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2y1XhNYaiCJm_sJmuxQuvW3smZp9JY5ystzYWyWD8MGrlyAh3b1cTmPQJUm37HWUJj5Fb_tanhG9Ti-TDOVlaM1BveGwtFrnMcomYtuP4g5Onn1XHyWgAJHubP15QjOahAwEaCzWenNQ/s1600/rev1+austin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2y1XhNYaiCJm_sJmuxQuvW3smZp9JY5ystzYWyWD8MGrlyAh3b1cTmPQJUm37HWUJj5Fb_tanhG9Ti-TDOVlaM1BveGwtFrnMcomYtuP4g5Onn1XHyWgAJHubP15QjOahAwEaCzWenNQ/s1600/rev1+austin.jpg" height="320" width="261" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIZdXq5FWVytEFrdcs5oesNvRoGfV4Qv7sCUAh1CA9anehTZrezBB-3TwzFyj1V3KBX_7cJ4krsjAsqIuPV1MFv4d31krh3QxJjUOH24vYVETKo0V_P00Yvn64CFWw-R_CKHEnQlY4emY/s1600/rev1+liam.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIZdXq5FWVytEFrdcs5oesNvRoGfV4Qv7sCUAh1CA9anehTZrezBB-3TwzFyj1V3KBX_7cJ4krsjAsqIuPV1MFv4d31krh3QxJjUOH24vYVETKo0V_P00Yvn64CFWw-R_CKHEnQlY4emY/s1600/rev1+liam.jpg" height="320" width="261" /></a></div>
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Thank you so much to my dear friend and co-author <a href="http://samschooler.com/">Sam Schooler</a> for doing the photoshop work on these!<br />
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If you're coming to GRL, tell me . . . who would you most like to see as a button or a bookmark? (I'm pretty partial to Bobby myself!)<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-37031823863123199372014-05-20T14:20:00.001-07:002014-05-20T14:20:41.031-07:00Thoughts on #RT14So I'm newly home from RT 2014 in New Orleans and like everyone else, I have Opinions. So let's get to it.<br />
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<b>1. Overall, I'm very glad I came and I feel that (for me) it was worth the money.</b><br />
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I feel like that's important to state right off the bat. I got the slightly discounted 6-day convention pass thanks to being on a panel, I paid for my several nights hotel and cabfare and food, and my flights to/from cost me $1300 and hours of headache thanks to Expedia being the world's worst travel company :spits:.<br />
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I also had a free chapbook paperback that was given away in the various freebie rooms, AND my press put a download code for my trans/genderqueer novel <i>Wallflower</i> into everybody's badge bag thing you got at registration. All in, I'd say this convention ran me something close to $3000, if not more. I sold exactly three paperbacks at the Giant Book Fair (more on that--sans tasteless tone-deaf civil rights metaphors--later), so obviously I didn't make my money back in book sales, <i>not that I was ever expecting to. </i><br />
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So why was it worth it to me?<br />
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<li>I was<a href="http://www.rtbookreviews.com/rt-daily-blog/lgbtq-romance-beyond-pronouns-2014-rt-convention"> featured on a panel with some Big Name Authors</a> and feel like I held my own beside them. I feel happy and privileged to have gotten the chance to basically piggyback on their draw (because let's face it, if I'd been the sole panelist the panel would NOT have been standing-room only as it was). Of course, if you're not the kind of uppity loudmouth who can manage to do anything but shrink like a violet beside Suzanne Brockmann when she's in fine form, this benefit may not apply to you. </li>
<li>I made several media connections, partially thanks to my participation in said panel. I'm stoked to get myself and my genre that kind of legitimizing publicity. </li>
<li>The panels I was able to attend were educational and thought-provoking and hopefully will improve my craft. I'm kicking myself that I wasn't able to attend the "<a href="https://www.rtconvention.com/event/across-color-lines-multicultural-romance-past-present-and-future">Across the Color Lines</a>" panel that was hosted by Mala Bhattacharjee (anyone have links to write-ups of it?) or several other panels that were all hosted simultaneously, but I imagine everyone has that problem with double bookings.</li>
<li>New Orleans is an amazing city and I got to experience a bit of it. I ate great food, met great people, had some pretty awesome unique experiences, and can't wait to get back sometime when I don't have a massive commitment eating up most of my time.</li>
<li>I got to touch base with friends and twitter acquaintances and authors and readers and industry professionals I admire. For a lonely extrovert like me, the socialization alone was worth the price of admission.</li>
<li>I got to meet (for the first time ever or for the first time in person) and spend time with intelligent, outspoken, opinionated, well-read women. That's a benefit in and of itself. I make no secret of loving smart women, so I was in heaven all week. If you saw me at the con, I was probably in a state of twitterpated awe and chinhands.</li>
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In sum, while I don't know if I will "get my money back" in any kind of direct way, I do feel like I paid for an experience and an opportunity and got both in spades.</div>
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<b>2. I'm excited that LGBT romance had a track, but there's still more to be done</b></div>
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According to Sarah Frantz (who was captain), this is RT's first time having an official LGBT track, though not its first time with LGBT content. The "standing room only" nature of every LGBT event proves LGBT visibility and an LGBT space at RT is important and necessary, but of course there are things that can be improved for next time:</div>
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<b>Improved visibility for the LBT </b>being chief among them.<b> </b>I know that M/M outsells every other subgenre of queer romance--much as gay cis men dominate LGBT and queer spaces and get most of the representation <i>everywhere else in the world ever</i>, but while we can't control the market demand, we can control the balance of panels and featured guests, and I hope that whoever is in charge of the LGBT track for RT15 will be open to suggestions for authors and industry professionals who do more than M/M, so by all means, if you know of a fantastic non-M/M speaker, do speak up! </div>
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The "Soup To Nuts" LGBT panel featuring Ruth Sternglantz from Bold Strokes Books was fabulous and featured a fair amount of F/F-leaning content thanks to her input and her presence, and LA Witt's LAMBDA-finalist trans-themed novel <i>Static </i>made the rounds as what appeared to be a very popular freebee, but I'd love to see every LGBT-labelled (aka not explicitly specifically M/M) panel and event make space for representatives of lesbian, bisexual, and trans fiction. Who would you like to see? </div>
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<b>Queer voices at the forefront</b> would be another (somewhat selfish, lol) request. Sarah Frantz is openly bisexual and panels this year featured lesbian women, gay men, and bisexual women including moi, but (as far as I know) no transgender panelists or queer POC, who of course have a unique and important perspective. While I happily read books written by straight authors and love all my straight readers, and further think straight people are welcome to participate and have an opinion on queer romance, I do think it's also important that queer people get a platform to not only speak, but also to be THE speakers (if that makes sense?) about a genre that explores and monetizes our experiences. I was SO glad to see so many queer people front and centre at this year's convention, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't want MORE. What about a panel only featuring queer-identified persons that specifically addresses our wants and needs within the genre, and could also serve as a chance for straight authors and readers and professionals to learn how best to be allies within the genre?</div>
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<b>Queer space within RT</b>. Having an LGBT track officially was a great start, as was the twitter hashtag #QueerRT14 (which I hope gets more traction next year!), but I'd love to see even more queer visibility. How about an LGBT author/reader ribbon that sticks to the "Published Author" or "Reader" etc. ribbons, or a pin, some manner of visibly LGBT badge pin that isn't otherwise "branded" (aka I had my rainbow Riptide pin and others had Rainbow Writers Association pins, but I'd love to see something more all-encompassing that includes queer YA, NA, adult romance and erotic romance, f/f, m/m, etc.) so that readers can immediately identify authors of LGBT romance? </div>
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I also agree, as others have requested, that the RT awards should have a specific LGBT award category (while still leaving the more "general" categories open to LGBT romance as well), much as is done for say, Scottish Historicals or Shapeshifter Paranormals, so that we have an award space that is "our own". Hell, have an LGBT category and then m/m, f/f, and trans subcategories within that so we all get a chance at recognition! I know there is argument that this makes LGBT romance a "ghetto" (and I really hate using that word specifically for stuff that's NOT about racial segregation), but as long as we're not LIMITED to being acknowledged within that space, it's also a chance for recognition in a space where we can very easily get lost.</div>
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And finally, an LGBT "row" or some other form of solidarity/visibility in the Giant Book Fair would be a nice thing to have, as well. YA and NA have these clearly laid out spaces, so having an LGBT one could be nice too, or if we could even organize something ourselves (such as a visible identifier to help readers interested in LGBT romance to find us like some FESTIVE RAINBOW BALLOONS!). As a lesser-known author, that level of "discoverability" would be a great thing to have in a space where you're hoping new-to-you readers are browsing your offerings.</div>
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<b>3. The Giant Book Fair had flaws, but it wasn't Jim Crow</b></div>
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White people, don't fucking compare shit to systemic racism and white supremacy. DON'T. DO NOT. </div>
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Considering how fucking dumbshit people are acting, I almost don't <i>want </i>to complain about my book fair experience because I don't want to get lumped in with that nonsensical and offensive tantrum <i>or</i> add to it. On the other hand, I do have criticisms. </div>
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I was seated in the "Indie" section of the fair, which <a href="http://www.courtneymilan.com/ramblings/2014/05/18/rts-giant-bookfair/">was in fact a "Books Sold on Consignment" section</a>. Actually getting my books checked in wasn't a huge drama or hassle, but it was INCREDIBLY confusing and required a lot of coaching and clarification for a first-timer, but in the end I managed it. </div>
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I have nothing against authors who choose to self-publish and admire their ability to keep all that business-end stuff straight and think they damn well earn their higher royalty rate. However, I won't lie and say I wasn't frustrated to be in a room labelled "Indie", as that word specifically has negative connotations, partially because of dumb bullshit like the current temper tantrum. I understand that "Books on Consignment" isn't as useful a designation, but Indie was inaccurate and may have discouraged some people from attending that section of the fair. (I know as a reader I would have no interest in an Indie Book Fair). I wish the fact that it was also SMALL PRESS would have been better advertised, and I think the fact that we were all referred to REPEATEDLY as "Indie" is a much bigger faux-pas on the part of RT than one volunteer referring to the room as "for aspiring authors" one time. </div>
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Where I was sitting, there actually wasn't a lot of foot traffic, and as a nobody author, I was depending on attracting the notice of passers-by who weren't there specifically to see me. On the other hand, smaller-name authors in the "Traditionally Published" room had more passers-by but were more likely to be completely obstructed by the massive lines for the bestsellers. So on that front, it was half a dozen of one or the other.</div>
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I heard that the fire marshall was the reason things were so cramped (much more cramped than expected) in the "Indie" section, but WOW were they cramped. I had room to put my three titles and then exactly TWO stacks of postcards. No swag, no poster, no nothing. The author next to me had a following/street team AND about three times the amount of books I brought, AND swag, so I felt pretty squeezed out the entire time. She was plenty nice herself, but her fans completely obstructed my spot the entire time I was there. Which was partially a space issue because any more than one person talking to the author at a time meant they were blocking more than that author's designated space, and partially a courtesy issue because said street team hung around and visited in a massive cloud in front of our table even when they WEREN'T lining up to speak to the author herself. And when someone with mobility issues came specifically to see me, they were incredibly rude about letting her through their gossip session to speak to me. I basically spent the entire 4 hours hidden behind a mass of people so it wasn't exactly a worthwhile enterprise for me on any front. My readers had a hard time finding or approaching me, AND I didn't get any kind of visibility to attract new to me authors passing by. The con itself wasn't a waste of my time and money, but the bookfair definitely was. </div>
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I similarly felt lost because of the reasons above where there was no immediate way for LGBT readers to find LGBT authors. </div>
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I'm also confused because the "Indie" section was for POD publishers and small and e-first presses as well as the self published, and both Carina and Riptide Publishing were in that section, but Dreamspinner Press (a publisher with a similar business model to Riptide as far as I can tell), was in the traditional publishing room with the Big 5. What was up with that?<br />
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I've heard lots of reasonable criticism of the book fair from reasonable people, so hopefully next year RT will take that criticism and come up with different solutions. I'd love to see the Returnable/Non-Returnable book sections combined so that 1. Us small-press authors aren't arbitrarily shoved off into another room with less space and less visibility and less foot-traffic/discoverability, 2. Then traditionally published authors can actually sell their self-pub and POD titles as well as their traditionally published stuff versus having to choose. There HAS to be a way to host an integrated book fair. There has to. Any (constructive) thoughts?<br />
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<b>4. The officially sponsored parties weren't worth my time, but the lobbycon was!</b><br />
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Anyone who met me at GRL knows I love to party. I love to dance until all hours, I love to jump up and down and get my makeup wrecked.<br />
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RT was . . . not like that for me. I went to a couple of the parties but just found them crowded with too big of lines and weird lighting and with all the important professional people there, I definitely didn't want to drink AT ALL. So I didn't. It really felt like RT was not the time to party, so I don't know if I *had* been maybe the parties would have had a greater draw for me, but as it was, they didn't.<br />
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But that was okay, because there was PLENTY of fun happening in the (oh-so-intolerably loud) hotel lobby bar. I met people from across genres, we chatted, we talked business, we drank, we played Cards Against Humanity . . . it was an absolute blast. If you could tolerate the noise, there was so much socializing to be had, and no lineups whatsoever!<br />
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<b>5. New Orleans is amazing</b><br />
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There's never a dull moment. The food's amazing, the people are warm and funny, the atmosphere's electric, the architecture's stunning, the fortune tellers are sassy, and I <i>have</i> to go back. But you know, on a trip where I don't have to spend 95% of my time in one hotel. ;)<br />
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Never did get to go on a ghost tour, cher!<br />
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That's my take, anyway. Anyone else got linkups to interesting writeups?</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-65581052038960066512014-02-24T10:37:00.000-08:002014-02-24T11:21:50.852-08:00A Rape Survivor on Writing "Non-Con"<b>TW: Rape, Childhood Sexual Abuse, Eroticized Rape</b><br />
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I've wanted to write this post for a really long time, but it's been an uphill journey to thinking that I could or even should. Even now, I'm not really sure. It's not an easy subject to write about, it's not a subject without controversy, and to top it all off, it's highly personal, to me and likely to many of you reading.<br />
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So I'll come right out and say it: I'm a survivor of rape and childhood sexual abuse, and I write non-con.<br />
<br />
But first, a note on genre. There's a lot of debate surrounding the term "non-con." It stands for "non consent", as in "non-consensual sex", as in "rape." It exists, <i>as a genre of fiction</i>, in contrast to "dub-con," which itself stands for "dubious consent", and also refers to situations that in the real world would rightly be called rape.<br />
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Many people assert that we only use these terms to euphemistically pretty up rape fetishes, or try to assuage our guilt about consuming them--"Oh, I don't get off on rape, just non-con!" I'm not going to dismiss that belief outright, as I definitely think there's validity and truth to it, but I will say that when I use these terms, I use them only as a way of distinguishing between different fictional representations of rape.<br />
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Here's an excerpt from <a href="http://top2bottomreviews.wordpress.com/2012/06/08/salting-the-earth-hard-questions-with-heidi-belleau-and-violetta-van/">an old post of mine</a> that further elaborates on my perspective:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
When we’re talking about non-con or dub-con, we’re talking about <b>erotica</b> specifically. [A] depiction of rape not meant explicitly to arouse is a completely different beast. So, assuming the purpose of erotica is to arouse, then the difference between non- and dub-con lies in <i>how</i> they’re meant to arouse. </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Non-con is all about a character who says and means no, and then is raped regardless. The appeal of these scenes is their sexualized suffering and violation. These stories can either be sympathetic to the rapist or to the victim, which is a further distinction that also changes the shape of the narrative and also the specific appeal of the story. Someone who enjoys stories that sympathise with the victim might not like ones that sympathise with the rapist, and vice versa. </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Dub-con, on the other hand, is about someone who says no but means yes, or someone who says yes but means no: for example, a bodice-ripper where a heroine says no but discovers sex was what she wanted all along, or a story where a person is coerced into sex or has to have sex to save their life or their house or their job. Here, the appeal is more about the tension inherent in a scenario where consent and desire don’t match up, whether that means saying no and meaning yes, or saying yes and meaning no.</blockquote>
In sum: non-con and dub-con are both subgenres of erotica, fiction explicitly meant to titillate. When I say "non-con" I mean "fictionalized rape written for sexual enjoyment." A fictional account of rape that <i>isn't </i>meant as erotica I would just call "rape fiction," and what happens in real life to real people is rape. What happened to me and to many other women and men I've known is rape. I wouldn't call it anything else, not unless I'm following the language the victim/survivor has chosen to use for themselves about their own experiences.<br />
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So now that we've got that distinction of genre out of the way, it's time for me to get personal.<br />
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Rape and me have a long history. Considering the pervasiveness of rape culture, that statement is probably true for most of us. For me, though, I can remember the exact moment when it started.<br />
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I was in elementary school. A friend of mine called me breathlessly on the phone and told me I had to come over to her house right away, she had something mindblowing to show me.<br />
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What she had was an issue of Reader's Digest. That afternoon is so burned in my memory, I even remember the cover: it was a photo of a tidal wave. The article she turned to and had me read was a woman's detailed account of her abduction, rape, and release. My friend and I read it three times a piece together that day, and she later lent me her copy of the magazine. Afterwards, rape became a regular part of our pretend play: our Barbies were kidnapped and raped nearly constantly. We even acted out (in a non-explicit way) rape scenarios using our own bodies.<br />
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As for the woman whose story so electrified us? I don't know her name. I don't know how she's recovered or where she is now. But I remember the detailed account of her rape. I'm not going to recount it here, obviously, but it was presented with a level of sexual detail I'd never seen or heard at that age. I won't call what I felt reading her story "arousal"--I was too young, and it didn't resemble any sexual feelings I have now that I'm an adult--but I definitely experienced a sense of titillation that could be termed as proto-arousal. Back then, I thought of it as "tingling"; whatever it was psychologically or developmentally, it was a game-changer. It was my first sexual experience, and it was of rape.<br />
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Now, in our culture, exposing kids to sex too soon or in an inappropriate way is rightfully frowned upon. Had this woman's story been consensual, it never would have been published; not in that level of detail, and not in a magazine like Reader's Digest. I'm sure my friends' parents wouldn't have left it around where she could read it. But it was about a rape, not consensual sexual pleasure, so it was freely available, and it was explicit. For more on our double standard re: women in sexual situations, just check out <a href="http://www.bustle.com/articles/10342-how-pg-13-r-ratings-wage-war-against-women">how differently movies in North America are rated depending on whether a scene shows a woman experiencing sexual pleasure vs. sexual violence</a>.<br />
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I don't know how much of the story's lurid presentation was the explicitness of the victim's own recounting, and how much of it was how Reader's Digest chose to interview her and how to present that interview. Without their influence, would she have told the world the specific details of how she was sexually abused by her captor? I have no idea. I sure as shit know that in telling her story, she wasn't expecting or intending on a pair of little girls to come across it and become excited or enthralled by it. I'm not angry at her. I hope she's not angry at me. I didn't understand the difference between fiction and reality, then. I didn't have fully developed empathy. If I read the same story today, I would <b>never</b> find it sexually exciting. If your first reaction to someone's personal account of their rape is arousal and not horror or anger or grief or empathy or even pity, I genuinely think you need to seek help.<br />
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Our culture makes it much easier for us to view and consume depictions of rape than depictions of healthy sexuality (especially as it pertains to women experiencing sexual pleasure). Because of that, my first sexual experience was inextricably tied with another woman's rape and abuse. It almost certainly shaped how I would later experience sexual fantasy and sexual pleasure.<br />
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As long as I've had sexual fantasies, I've had fantasies about rape. When I was sexually abused as a preteen, and later when I was raped as a teenager, those fantasies never abated. In a way, they were an escape during the times when I thought my own sexuality was vile and disgusting and pathetic and wrong. Fantasizing about being raped, after all, was different from fantasizing about seeking or enjoying sex.<br />
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However, they also left me with a pile of guilt and confusion. Since I fantasized about rape (although never about my actual rape or rapist), did that mean I secretly wanted to be raped and my rapist had sensed it? Since I fantasized about rape, did that mean I deserved to be raped, or that I didn't deserve to be upset about my rape? Surviving rape is a horrible, difficult thing. Not only have you been violated, but you're later re-victimized by peoples' judgments and comments, bombarded by careless depictions of rape and rape apologism, and to top it all off, you're often unable to access any form of meaningful justice. No man who has violated has ever come to justice for what he did. Which is to say, I never felt like there was a point to getting the law involved, but even for victims who do seek justice through the legal system, they don't always (or even often) find it, even if their rapist was convicted of a crime.<br />
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Dealing with all that <i>and</i> still fantasizing about being raped . . . I was a mess. Thankfully, in college I came across <a href="http://www.amazon.ca/The-Survivors-Guide-Sex-Empowered/dp/1573440795">The Survivor's Guide to Sex</a>, a self-help book about reclaiming your sexuality and experiencing sexual pleasure after being a victim of rape, sexual abuse, or incest. It had a chapter on rape victims with rape fantasies that literally changed my life. This book told me it was normal, how I felt, even for someone who had been victimized. If you're struggling with sex after rape, whether you have rape fantasies or not, whether you want to accept them or not, I highly recommend the book.<br />
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As for me, a crucial part of my healing journey was to let go of my guilt.<br />
<br />
This wasn't a decision I made lightly, and for me, it was literally a matter of life or death. The self-hatred was consuming me. <b>I would not have survived if I hadn't let go of the guilt</b>.<br />
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But that doesn't mean I don't still think critically about what turns me on and why.<br />
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I know the prevalence of eroticized rape in our society has to do with misogyny and rape culture. I know that I'm not the only person in the world to have had a formative sexual experience tied to rape in some way, colouring the way I experience my sexuality now. I've gone from guilt to acceptance about my proclivities, and while I don't subscribe to the ultra sex-positive school of "sexual feelings exist in a vacuum and are never wrong and you can never express them in hurtful ways", I'm also done apologizing for how I've personally chosen to process rape culture and my own past abuse.<br />
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Survivor or not, all women have been affected by rape culture and the demonization of female sexuality, and all of us work through it and react to it in different ways. Rape fantasy is one of those ways. As long as you keep the fantasies in the realm of fiction: you don't act them out with unwilling partners, you don't force people to read or hear about them, you don't make unwilling survivors the subject of your fetish by using their real-life experiences for sexual fodder . . . As long as it's fantasy, and as long as it's consensual where it counts--(for more on that,<a href="http://www.heidibelleau.com/2014/02/like-it-or-not-breaking-and-bending.html"> check out this related post I wrote on Breaking and Bending Consent in Erotic Fiction</a>)-- I think we have a right to our fantasies. We have a right to accept them <i>and</i> a right to find them troubling and want to move past them.<br />
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I don't expect other people to share my proclivities, or enjoy them, or even approve of them-- especially not other survivors--but I'm done hating myself and I'm done trying to "fix" myself. I think of my sexuality as an individual journey I am going on. This is where I am at this point in time, and I feel safe and secure and healthy, while still accepting that other people <i>can't </i>accept how I am or how they are, and that's valid, too. To each their own.<br />
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In my mind, there are different ways to embrace your sexuality. There's reflective reasoned self-acceptance, and there's being egotistically, willfully blind. I can't pretend that I am not a part of rape culture. I can't pretend that nobody has the right to be hurt or offended by the concept of a rape fantasy. I can't pretend that our individual fantasies have no effect on people outside ourselves; just ask any transgender woman, any fat woman, any Asian or black woman (or man), how it feels to be somebody's fetish. How it feels to be dehumanized by a fetish, mistreated in the name of a fetish, forced into a fetish.<br />
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So how do I justify writing non-con? I acknowledge that it's not a zero-harm enterprise, although I wish it could be. I wish I could write about these topics that excite and intrigue me without ever contributing to the harmful miasma of rape culture. I wish I could write them without ever causing a moment of hurt in other rape survivors who may find my stories exploitative or triggering. So why just not do it? Why not keep my fantasies in my head?<br />
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Honestly? Because sharing them lessens the load. I've often described the process of writing my non-con series <i>The Flesh Cartel </i>as an exorcism. Writing it gets it out of my head, so my mind can move onto other things. Having other people read it and discuss it makes me feel less alone. Owning it publicly makes it feel like less of a dirty secret, which in turn resolves my guilt about it. I try to minimize harm by using detailed and visible trigger warnings, by always speaking out in support of readers respecting their boundaries when it comes to their comfort level with the material, by not using the platform to reproduce unhealthy and dangerous attitudes about rape--which rape porn most certainly can, especially when you're talking about the misogynistic male-centric rape fantasy narratives that centre around "punishing" women for perceived crimes and that ask the audience to sympathize with the rapist character.<br />
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As for my own portrayal of rape, I don't know if I'm successful or not. I don't know if I'm doing enough. Trying to be mindful and participating conscientiously is all that I can offer. We all make concessions and compromises, and this is mine.<br />
<br />
Rape is a part of who I am and I write about it. Sometimes I write about it to titillate or excite, for thrills and chills. Sometimes I write about it in a less eroticized way, meant more to work through the culture of rape and the emotional repercussions of sexual violence, especially as it relates to my characters' gender, race, and social class.<br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><a href="http://riptidepublishing.com/titles/collections/flesh-cartel-season-1-damnation">The Flesh Cartel </a></i>and <i><a href="http://riptidepublishing.com/titles/king-dublin">King of Dublin</a> </i>are definitely written for the thrill. Some people read them as erotica for sexual pleasure, while others read them as horror and thus are looking for the visceral (and sometimes sexual, but not wholly or always) reaction they get to being disgusted or frightened or anxious. Either way, it's about a satisfying emotional/gut response for the reader.<br />
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Stories like <a href="http://riptidepublishing.com/titles/cruce-de-caminos">Cruce de Caminos</a>, <a href="http://riptidepublishing.com/titles/mark-gladiator">Mark of the Gladiator</a>, and <a href="http://riptidepublishing.com/titles/wallflower-rear-entrance-video-2">Wallflower</a>, on the other hand, have scenes referencing or threatening rape, but they're not intentionally written for the thrills (although obviously some people may read them that way, the author being dead and all that). These are stories about 1. a young sex worker, 2. a slave in ancient Rome, and 3. a feminine-presenting trans person, respectively. Not that writing a narrative about these people <i>has </i>to include rape, but in those instances I felt rape was a natural and important part of the narrative as I wrote it. They're literary explorations of character and setting and culture, meant to be read with your head rather than your gut. To some, this is the only acceptable kind of rape narrative in fiction: one meant to seriously and thoughtfully explore the subject, and not meant to excite or titillate the reader in any way.<br />
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For me, both ways of approaching rape are valid, and worth exploring through fiction--just so long as the reader knows what they're getting into and is given opportunities to consent to or reject and avoid the material . . . which is why I distinguish between "rape" and "non-con" when it comes to fiction. <i>Flesh Cartel </i>and <i>King of Dublin</i>, I label "non-con". The other three, "rape." I talk about them differently, I approach them differently, I write about them differently, I market them differently. There may be an overlap in audience between both, but I'd hope that going in, expectations are different, and that I've fostered those differing expectations.<br />
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But they're both accurate representations of my understanding and experiences with rape. Will I--and my writing--evolve? Likely yes. But for now, this is the balance I've found, and that I can live with. What's yours?<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-51902632573373931942014-02-12T18:03:00.000-08:002014-07-03T17:43:13.403-07:00"Like it or Not": Breaking and Bending Consent in Erotic Fiction<span style="color: #666666;"><i>Note: This post first appeared in 2012 on the Storm Moon Press blog to coincide with the release of the anthology </i><a href="http://www.stormmoonpress.com/books/Like-It-Or-Not.aspx">Like it or Not</a><i>. It has since been deleted, so I am reproducing it here. It was originally co-authored with Violetta Vane, but I can no longer guarantee she endorses these views. This post does, however, still accurately represent my own. Its contents are therefore my responsibility alone.</i></span><br />
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</i> </span><br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">How does consent apply to fictional sex? </span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b id="docs-internal-guid-6ee1a182-28f8-1c61-5f6a-f33fcfd25c31" style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">For rape in real life, only one standard should matter: the lack of consent of the victim. Not the context. Not the level of physical harm. Not whether or not the victim fights back or to what degree. Not the intent of the aggressor. Despite attempts by some misguided people to define things like “gray rape” (ugh), there is, by moral necessity, a clear line. No consent? Rape. No possibility of consent? Rape. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In fiction, the situation is vastly different. The first step is to state the obvious: consent violation or consent play is acted out between fictional characters. Fictional characters have lines of consent that are constructed artificially—woven together before they’re broken—in the dynamic interplay between writer, text and audience. Context matters. Who is the writer writing it for? Who might the writer sympathize with? Who do they want the audience to sympathize with? What level of insight are readers given into the characters’ level of consent?</span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Audience and genre become crucial, too. Is the story meant as a quasi-memoir to share with other people who have gone through similar experiences? A sexual fantasy explicitly disconnected from real-life reenactment? Is it meant primarily for women to read, or for a general audience, or for men, and what’s the primary intended sexuality of the audience? Does the writer frame the story by saying how they mean it to be read and dictating what kinds of people should read the story? And if they do, will readers feel any obligation whatsoever to follow those instructions? </span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Types of Potential Fictional Consent Violations</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sex work </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- There’s a wide spectrum of consent possibilities in depictions of sex work. Some sex workers may enjoy particular jobs and enthusiastically consent to them. Many more enjoy it about as much as a sandwich artist at a sub shop enjoys making a sandwich... but they still consent to it. Others in the most desperate of circumstances have limited (or no, in the case of modern sexual slavery and human trafficking) ability to consent. A lot of erotic narratives of sex work cluster around consent issues in the middle of the spectrum—dubious consent—that we’ll discuss later.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Rough sex </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">- This encompasses any kind of sex with fighting and struggling. Consent is played with, but only up to a limit. The struggling is not about whether or not there will be sex, but about what </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">kind</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> of sex. That is, one of the partners is not trying to escape, and they’ve made some kind of agreement, explicit or not, to struggle against each other and accept the outcome. The fighting lacks real stakes of consent, and everybody has a good time, no matter who ends up on top or how many bruises they have the next day.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Rape fantasy roleplaying</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> - In these narratives, consent is played with, but it’s not a real issue in the story, because the partners have already given each other consent to play certain roles. They both have power over when and where the play will stop. The play-victim can sink into pleasurable passivity with no fear. The play-aggressor can exert control in a pleasurable way without worrying that they’re harming their partner. For the reader, this is a fantasy within a fantasy, and therefore two steps removed from real-life consent issues. It’s safe for the reader as well as the characters. This can be a good thing or a bad thing; sometimes readers crave portrayals that aren’t so </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">clean</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, that have a greater level of verisimilitude to real-life lack of consent.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Dub-con</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> - Dubious consent. This is a much more difficult category to define. It’s more of a catch-all for certain tropes, and different writers and readers will draw the line between dub-con and non-con at very different places. Dubious consent does </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">not</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> necessarily mean that a given fictional situation would not be rape in the real world. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">One possible standard is that dub-con covers sex for any other situation than “You’re hot, I want to have sex with you.” Or perhaps one or more partners is in some kind of condition that limits their ability to consent. Transactional sex could fall into this category. One partner </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">needs</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> to have sex, for financial, political, or supernatural reasons. The other partner </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">may or may not know about this need</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. Maybe one person is about to lose their home and live on the streets if they don’t have the sex. Or maybe there is no victim/aggressor dynamic at all, and both characters are under some magic spell that if they don’t have sex, they’ll die (AKA “fuck or die”). Or strange entities outside of a human moral framework coerce the partners into have sex (AKA “aliens made them do it” or “sex pollen”—favorites of our home fandom, Torchwood). </span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Dub-con can apply to other types of consent play in which consent is obscured or made problematic. For a rape fantasy roleplay, what if the writer starts the first page in the middle of the roleplay? The reader might not know it’s a roleplay. Maybe that’s only established at the end, or it’s established inconclusively. Maybe it’s a rough sex scene that goes bad halfway through, or a BDSM scene done wrong, on accident or on purpose.</span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Dubious consent is common across many genres. Many books with paranormal elements are absolutely </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">stuffed</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> full of dubious consent. Vampires first hypnotize then pleasurably penetrate their prey. Werewolves go into heat. Fairies glamor mortals into sex. Characters who feel a supernatural attraction or compulsion to have sex are all over urban fantasy, horror, and paranormal romance. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Our own story for the anthology, “Salting the Earth”, starts off in dub-con territory, although it might not </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">end</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> there. Ronan, our main character, is a vulnerable young man who makes a very bad decision for the very best of reasons. He’s forced into a situation where he has to trade his body to gain back someone dear to him. The </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">sidhe</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> seem to grant him that choice—they’re the Irish true-to-folklore fairies, so they’re wingless and rather terrifying—but at the center of the story is the question of whether he ever really had a choice at all.</span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Non-con</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> - There is no agreed upon single definition, but non-con generally portrays lack of consent meant to titillate. Consent explicitly </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">isn’t </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">given. There may even be a struggle or an openly said “no”. Non-con is usually written for the reader to identify with the victim, who often (but not always) comes to enjoy the experience even though they initially didn’t want it. The victim is usually shown as enjoying the sex despite—or </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">because of—</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">the lack of consent. </span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The most common examples of non-con, although they’re usually not labelled as such, are so-called “bodice rippers”. They used to be a hugely popular form of mainstream romance, but their popularity has diminished in recent decades. This oft-maligned genre arose out of the sexual politics of the day—and to some extent, </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">our </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">day—that simultaneously demanded heroines have sex as a part of the romantic plot, but also couldn’t show them seeking sex for fear of having them appear “promiscuous”: thus the heroine who is raped by the hero, learning halfway through that sex with him was what she wanted and needed all along. </span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In modern M/M, these issues with female sex and desire are different. Female desire is either a moot point within the story, or perhaps coded and decoded into male-bodied form. Non-con can serve other purposes, some of which may overlap with the bodice rippers. For example, Non-con allows the writer and reader to explore the most extreme of sexual power dynamics in a way that is physically safe. </span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">People write and read these narratives for a variety of reasons, and it’s impossible to establish either purity or impurity of intention from the outside; many people don’t know exactly why they like it themselves. Non-con isn’t safe for everyone: the potential for psychological harm exists, just as it does with </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">any</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> narrative, sexual or non-sexual, involving extreme emotions. But the basic principle is that non-con hits primal extremes of emotion—desire, terror—while preserving some measure of safety for the reader. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Slavery</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> - In BDSM, this can, like rape fantasy, still mean “safe, sane, consensual”, where consent is clearly and freely given with boundaries negotiated by both parties before the “scene”. Even in more time-intense scenarios, in which the master has control over certain aspects of the slave’s non-sexual life, if there’s still clear consent negotiation, it’s neither dub-con nor non-con. At any time, the slave can decide they don’t want to keep playing the role. </span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Outside of that scenario, this goes straight into non-con or rape fiction, because real slaves, unlike sex workers, cannot give consent </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">because they do not have the power to withhold consent</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. The master might believe it’s consensual, and the slave can even make themselves believe it’s consensual as a defense mechanism, but it would still be rape in real life due to the lack of ability to withhold consent. Most people understand this even on a subconscious level... hence the controversy over the incontrovertible DNA evidence that Thomas Jefferson repeatedly raped his slaves. Slave fiction set in fantasy worlds where slavery exists, or that use popular historical settings like ancient Rome, sometimes choose to explore these ethical issues. It depends on the degree of verisimilitude to real-life slavery (historical or modern) that these stories want to establish.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Rape fiction</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> - Another genre which can be difficult to define. At first, it seems clear: rape fiction portrays rape in a manner intended to disturb and frighten. Rape here is sometimes used for cheap shock value, or it can honestly and unflinchingly explore the experience of rape and its aftermath. Examples of rape in fiction are numerous and varied, with “rape revenge” being a common plot element across many genres.</span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It can also be pornographic, intentionally or not. For example, stories can be written from the POV of the rapist or a voyeur, and the source of titillation in this case isn’t about the extreme power dynamics and loss of control as with the non-con examples above, but instead about asserting power through the debasement or “punishment” of someone else. It’s hard to draw an exact line, because other forms of fiction will also depict the POV of the rapist or draw on elements of humiliation to create realism or intensify emotion, and sometimes well-meaning portrayals of rape meant to disturb or frighten can take on an exploitative sexual layer. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> is the current most popular example of rape fiction. The protagonist’s rape is absolutely central to the narrative. In the movie, audiences are first asked to identify with her as a victim, when she’s violently raped by her parole officer. She then turns the tables and in a later scene, rapes </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">him</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">; at this point, audiences are asked to identify with her as a rapist. However, critics of book and film argue that both portrayals are exploitative, regardless of who is being sympathised with or why, because </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">how</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> the act is portrayed is just as important as intent. By focusing on, say, the victim’s sexual attributes, a scene ostensibly meant to disgust can also titillate; sometimes this juxtaposition is accidental or unconscious, but sometimes it can be entirely intentional, a callous decision by the-powers-that-be to include sex in a way that doesn’t up the movie’s rating. An explicit </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">consensual</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> sex scene could lead to an NC-17, after all. Nothing about this is cut-and-dried, largely because the influence of rape in our society is so far-reaching even before introducing elements of author and audience.</span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">How realistically should erotica portray consent?</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We’ve used mainstream sources as examples to show that erotica and our type of m/m erotic romance really aren’t more “edgy”. In fact, they’re often simply more </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">honest</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> about the fictional connection between sexuality, consent and power. </span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Erotic fiction shouldn’t be held to higher ethical standards than mainstream fiction. But it shouldn’t necessarily be held to lower standards, either. With this in mind, one important ethical consideration in writing erotica involving consent is... does it support stereotypes that contribute to the oppression and pain of real-life people who are most vulnerable to rape? We’ve listed some misogynist stereotypes above since, as women, that’s the area in which we have the most personal experience, but there are stereotypes specific to vulnerable </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">men</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, straight or not (“prisoners deserve rape”), and others specific to LGBTQ people such as “corrective rape”. And there are rape stereotypes along many other axes such as race and disability.</span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Some argue that erotica has no social responsibility whatsoever, and fantasy should always be free from judgement. Others, that erotica should always be written with an eye to encouraging healthy real-life sexual practices. Most withhold that “always” and fall somewhere in the middle of the two extremes. Where does dub-con fit? And non-con, and other stories that stretch the boundaries of consent? That depends largely on the writer... and the reader.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When we wrote “Salting the Earth” for the </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Like it or Not</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> anthology, we created a story that’s very much in the middle, and in more than one way. It takes place between two worlds: the magical, extramoral realm of the </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">sidhe </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">mound and the realistic one of modern Ireland. And these two worlds won’t stay neatly apart. Grim events in the real world are called forth within the mound, stripped from their human ethical context and transformed into stage plays for the sake of inhuman aesthetic pleasure. Conversely, events within the mound have lasting real-world impact: unlike the legends of fairy gold, they don’t fade away by daylight. </span></span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Fear, love, shame, erotic arousal... all of these emotions blaze brightly as they burn across both worlds. And to some degree, all erotic stories involving consent aim to work this way: to bring readers close to the fire without getting burned. </span></div>
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Links for further reading:</span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Here is the latest legal definition of rape. | FBI: </span><a href="http://www.fbi.gov/news/pressrel/press-releases/attorney-general-eric-holder-announces-revisions-to-the-uniform-crime-reports-definition-of-rape" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Attorney General Eric Holder Announces Revisions to the Uniform Crime Report’s Definition of Rape </span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">An article condemning rape jokes that also covers the place rape has in our cultural consciousness, including how it is depicted fictionally. | Fugitivus: </span><a href="http://fugitivus.wordpress.com/2009/06/24/a-woman-walks-into-a-rape-uh-bar/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A woman walks into a rape, uh, bar</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A good argument for the enthusiastic consent model. The whole blog is an excellent call for changing the way we talk about and have sex. | Yes Means Yes Blog: </span><a href="http://yesmeansyesblog.wordpress.com/2011/01/03/the-nonexistent-terrible-horrible-no-good-very-bad-consequences-of-enthusiastic-consent/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The (Nonexistent) Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Consequences of Enthusiastic Consent</span></a><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">An explanation of why it’s so problematic to confuse consent issues by creating definitions such as “gray rape” | Shakespeare’s Sister Blog: </span><a href="http://shakespearessister.blogspot.com/2007/08/gray-rape-is-bullshit-and-surviving.html" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Gray Rape is Bullshit, and Saying You Were Raped is Brave</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A guide to non-consent fiction meant to sexually arouse within the context of fanfiction. | Kink Bingo: </span><a href="http://kink-bingo.dreamwidth.org/257240.html" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Force Me, Please: On Noncon and Noncon Play in Fanfic</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A thoughtful discussion of rape in the romance genre.| Dear Author Blog: </span><a href="http://dearauthor.com/features/letters-of-opinion/of-rape-and-rape-fantasies" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Of Rape And Rape Fantasies</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A good short piece dispelling myths about rape of men. | South Eastern Centre Against Sexual Assault: </span><a href="http://www.secasa.com.au/index.php/workers/21/207" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Myths About Male Rape</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A look at the Rolling Stones’ song “Brown Sugar” shows how racist attitudes about rape and black women are mainstreamed and made acceptable. | </span><a href="http://www.whattamisaid.com/2009/05/sex-drugs-rock-n-rolland-raping-of.html" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What Tami Said Blog: Sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll...and the raping of enslaved black women</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">An article on problems of reception with “The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo”. This is where we got our point that mainstream movies show rape more explicitly than they will show consensual sex. | Motion Captured Blog: </span><a href="http://www.hitfix.com/blogs/motion-captured/posts/the-bigger-picture-what-happens-when-we-find-the-line-as-viewers" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Bigger Picture: What happens when we find 'The Line' as viewers?</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: disc; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Dan Savage’s advice to a gay man anxious about becoming sexually aroused over homophobic pornography. | </span><a href="http://www.avclub.com/articles/december-28-2011,67023/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Savage Love: December 28th, 2011, First Letter</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-size: 15px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-28630896471749587392013-12-23T08:46:00.000-08:002014-01-31T20:55:50.332-08:00New Release: The Dom ProjectHappy holidays, all! I come bearing gifts of dirty books!<br />
<br />
Namely my M/F friends-to-lovers BDSM romance <a href="http://www.solaceames.com/p/the-dom-project.html#tdptour">The Dom Project</a> is finally out from <a href="http://ebooks.carinapress.com/en/ContentDetails.htm?ID={FD1B3262-F26D-4F6C-B6A6-DE25D3A9555C}">Carina Press</a>!<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3Lk9hyphenhypheneme0cniRrGcAJ9EOED-2yXH6LdVRhI0b2p7TGRY9umtPWqDK-QijUEZYP-z6t17s90H_lYhtdeV6h34oDeLd8PzvvzfMzCtt13Irc9h1Yi-G9-ChaNf1Q9NMYtCwK7-maYxsXM/s1600/CARINA_1213_9781426897672_DomProject_final.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3Lk9hyphenhypheneme0cniRrGcAJ9EOED-2yXH6LdVRhI0b2p7TGRY9umtPWqDK-QijUEZYP-z6t17s90H_lYhtdeV6h34oDeLd8PzvvzfMzCtt13Irc9h1Yi-G9-ChaNf1Q9NMYtCwK7-maYxsXM/s400/CARINA_1213_9781426897672_DomProject_final.jpg" height="400" width="252" /></a>By day, Robin Lessing has a successful career as a university archivist. By night, she blogs about her less-than-successful search for Mr. Tall, Dark and Dominant. Living up to her handle "The Picky Submissive," she's on the verge of giving up and settling for vanilla with a side of fuzzy handcuffs when she discovers her best friend and colleague has a kinky side, too. </blockquote><blockquote class="tr_bq">Sexy, tattooed techie John Sun is an experienced Dom who never lacks for playmates, male or female. If he can't satisfy Robin's cravings, maybe no one can--after all, he knows her better than anyone. So he offers to help her master the art of submission for one month. </blockquote><blockquote class="tr_bq">Robin eagerly agrees to John's terms, even the pesky little rule forbidding any friendship-ruining sex. But rules are made to be broken, and once they begin their stimulating sessions, it's not long before she's ready to beg him for more--much more...</blockquote><br />
And with our new release comes a blog tour! Follow along and you can win a gorgeous gray pearl necklace like the one Robin wears to symbolize her submission to her best friend and Dom, sexy tattooed techie John Sun. Click the graphic below (it's an image map!) for more info.<br />
<br />
<img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhu8T8SgzNd1ZfCYTJ7oSgCag-SlBFZp2jrh5j2FNRFYSiXwEbYSVR1mdLaZodU-D5sC_U_y8WqE1S03CML-U-BrlsviuE8WDBs1LUUXSvNS0XKLjh4fixoIIlVAB7sBzL3CIf3KknFcmC-/s1600/blogtour-final.jpg" height="292" usemap="#tdpblogtourmap" width="500" /><br />
<map name="tdpblogtourmap"><br />
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<area title="Wonkomance: Interview with Solace Ames & Heloise Belleau" alt="Wonkomance: Interview with Solace Ames & Heloise Belleau" coords="290,210,500,250" href="http://wonkomance.com/2014/01/09/a-wonkomance-interview-with-solace-ames-and-heloise-belleau/" shape="rect"></area><br />
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</map>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-77296134032399436212013-12-09T17:45:00.001-08:002013-12-09T17:45:48.657-08:00December Update!So I discovered I haven't posted in a really long time. Fact: when it comes to social media I am a great tweeter, a middling tumblr-er, a somewhat lacking blogger, and a FUCKING TERRIBLE facebooker. Now you know.<br />
<br />
So here's the haps:<br />
<br />
<b>Personal Life</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I'm going to Irelanddddd! In less than a week! I'm staying with my in-laws for Christmas and we're going to be there right through until after the new year! This is awesome, but also massively stressful because I have a LOT of deadlines coming up and the thought of trying to manage them while also being on vacation is kinda nuts.<br />
<br />
<b>Releases</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
In December, I have two. <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/inch-by-inch">The Professor's Rule #3: Inch by Inch</a> comes out December 16th. And on December 23rd, my first M/F writing as Heloise Belleau comes out! It's called <a href="http://ebooks.carinapress.com/729A7A6C-83D9-42AD-9FB5-94DFFD01737F/10/134/en/ContentDetails.htm?ID=FD1B3262-F26D-4F6C-B6A6-DE25D3A9555C">The Dom Project</a> and it's a friends-to-lovers BDSM rom com.<br />
<br />
<b>Books on Netgalley</b><br />
<br />
If you're a reviewer, you can find <a href="https://www.netgalley.com/catalog/list?q=heidi+belleau&sort=aztitle">several of my books</a> on Netgalley at present: a few of my current Riptide releases, a couple upcoming titles (including <a href="https://www.netgalley.com/catalog/show/id/40126">King of Dublin</a>, my Irish M/M Post-Apocalyptic novel written with Lisa Henry), as well as <a href="https://www.netgalley.com/catalog/show/id/39698">The Dom Project</a>.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSd06yDQjXqe3TpyIRw6nITOhm16WSEdySspn1X-hk9UbbvYyiJyco7FeMG0iJGZshRTgrOxZJ-9F4kpPUlVZOPTug_oNaVTXHXu3WkHPzNkNKAXjF2LBxHPy1cqCPYnvVzYf2lEC3hKQ/s1600/KingOfDublin_500x750-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSd06yDQjXqe3TpyIRw6nITOhm16WSEdySspn1X-hk9UbbvYyiJyco7FeMG0iJGZshRTgrOxZJ-9F4kpPUlVZOPTug_oNaVTXHXu3WkHPzNkNKAXjF2LBxHPy1cqCPYnvVzYf2lEC3hKQ/s320/KingOfDublin_500x750-2.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<br />
<b>Current Projects</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I just finished the first draft of Bliss, which is a dystopian mind control story I wrote with Lisa Henry. I'm just finishing edits on King of Dublin and just <i>starting</i> edits on <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/straight-shooter">Straight Shooter</a> (Rear Entrance Video #3, aka my hockey BDSM GFY). As for the writing end of things, I'm working on a novella called <i>Cinderella Boy</i> with Sam Schooler, all about a young man who has a terrible debt to his evil step father. I'm also midway through writing season 5 (the final season!!!) of Flesh Cartel with Rachel Haimowitz.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Upcoming Projects</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I am about to start solo work on a contemporary small town romance I'm contracted to write for Riptide that I'm tentatively calling <i>The Burnt Toast B&B</i>, which I intend to have finished by mid February. And then in the new year, I'll hopefully be writing a femdom f/m/m with LA Witt/Lauren Gallagher. For reasons. (Pervy ones.) I've also got plenty of other ideas which should keep me busy right through the year!<br />
<br />
<b>Goals for 2014</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I want to be finished The Flesh Cartel. I want to have published at least one more title as Heloise Belleau, be that M/F, F/M/M, or F/F. Most importantly, I want to land an agent, and potentially have a title accepted by a traditional big-six publisher. Possible? Likely? Who knows, but there ya go!<br />
<br />
<b>Awards</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I submitted my genderqueer novel <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/wallflower-rear-entrance-video-2">Wallflower</a> into the <a href="http://www.lambdaliterary.org/26th-annual-current-submissions/#tfiction">Transgender Fiction category for the Lambda Literary Awards</a>! I don't stand a snowball's chance in hell of winning, and I wasn't even going to enter, but somebody spontaneously pinged me on twitter to tell me there was a chance the Transgender categories weren't going to have enough interest to be split into Fiction and Non-Fiction, and that's just not right, so I put my name in to bump up the numbers.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Links</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Love in the Margins hosted an awesome <a href="http://loveinthemargins.com/2013/12/08/multicultural-romance-roundtable/">Multicultural Romance Roundtable</a> talking to POC authors of MC/IR romance their thoughts on the genre. It's a really fascinating topic being talked about by some really thoughtful commentators, and there are awesome comments on the post, as well! As a white author of IR/MC romance, it was a very enlightening read, but I bet there would be something there for everyone.<br />
<br />
Some disappointing news from Jeannie Lin at <a href="http://www.jeannielin.com/the-jade-temptress-the-future-of-jeannie-lin/">The Jade Temptress & The Future of Jeannie Lin</a>. I fully believe in Jeannie Lin's potential for success, and I think she'll do well for herself in e-publishing, but I can't help but feel sad hearing that she won't get another print run from HQN for her next title. I still remember the first time I saw her book Butterfly Swords on the shelf at my podunk local bookstore. I had <i>never </i>seen a romance novel with a POC on the cover before, and it was amazing for me to see that yes people were writing it, and somebody out there was willing to publish it. Amazing! Jeannie Lin, you're an inspiration, and I wish you nothing but success. I hope this setback turns out to just be a minor one!<br />
<br />
<b><br /></b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-5156989069451898302013-11-12T07:13:00.000-08:002013-11-14T14:36:29.579-08:00Queer Romance Blog HopWelcome to the Queer Romance Blog Hop, where queer writers and readers of queer romance share their thoughts on the genre, as well as a few recommendations for books to read! Everyone participating in this blog hop identifies as queer and also reads and/or writes (or edits, or reviews!) queer romance. For our purposes, queer romance refers to books with:<br />
<br />
1. LGBTQ+ <b>main</b> characters <br />
2. In romantic relationships<br />
3. That have a <b>happy</b> ending. (No Brokeback Mountain here, folks!)<br />
<br />
I'm Heidi Belleau, and I accidentally arranged this whole thing after a discussion with Laylah Hunter about how we felt that sometimes queer voices got lost in discussions of queer romance . . . even thought it's ostensibly <i>about us</i>! For the rest of November, I've gathered a whole pile of my fellow queer readers/writers/reviewers/editors/publishers to talk about queer romance: what they like, what they dislike, what growth they're hoping to see in the future, and what everyone, queer, questioning, and straight alike, can do to make that growth happen. So without further adieu, onto the interview!<br />
<br />
<b>1. Let’s start off with the getting-to-know-you stuff: How do you identify, and what does that mean to you? Whatever level of detail you’re comfortable with, of course!</b><br />
<b><br />
</b> I'm a cisgender bisexual woman. What that means is the gender of my heart matches the gender I was assigned at birth, and that I like people of the same gender as me, and people of different genders from me. My porn tumblr describes myself as a lady of "broad but exacting tastes".<br />
<br />
<b>2. What’s your preferred “flavour” of queer romance (e.g. trans*, f/f, m/m, menage with queer characters, etc.) Why?</b><br />
<br />
For the past while, I've been really into M/M, after moving from reading exclusively heterosexual M/F romance (because I didn't bloody know better!) However, I've been gathering recs and buying copies of other queer romance books. I've loved the trans* romance I've tried and am really looking forward to reading the f/f that's on my ereader. And of course, I have a soft spot for bisexual characters of any gender, because hey, they're just like me!<br />
<br />
<b>3. Do you write/read/review? Do you think being queer affects your participation or platform in romancelandia?</b><br />
<b><br />
</b> I write and of course read. The penname Heidi Belleau is for my M/M (which includes gay and bisexual men, and now a male-assigned genderqueer person). Heloise Belleau is for everything with women, basically. So I've got an M/F with a bisexual hero, and then I'm hoping to next write an M/F with a bisexual heroine and am also plotting an M/F/F!<br />
<br />
I'd like to think being queer at least lends a little bit of legitimacy to my writing. On the other hand, because I'm a woman, sometimes I feel like my queerness doesn't "count," especially in M/M. Sometimes I feel like I'm having to say "I'm actually queer" once a day because of the whole "straight women write/read m/m thing", but also because many believe that only gay men can write genuinely queer stories about male relationships. My expressions of queerness don't stop being valid/genuine to my experience just because I'm writing them through a male lens. Sure, queer women can still be fetishistic of gay men, but I'd love people to judge that by the author's text, and not their gender!<br />
<br />
<b>4. What drew you to queer romance?</b><br />
<br />
I've always included queer characters in everything I've written, because hey, I wanted to write books about people like me! Imagine my delight when I discovered there actually was a market, and a whole pile of readers hungry for stories not only about queer characters, but about queer characters in fulfilling relationships with happy endings! Yes!<br />
<br />
<b>5. What do you love about queer romance in general, and/or your specific subgenre?</b><br />
<br />
Happy endings. Positive portrayals. Feeling, a little bit, like I belong. After being raised on dead queer people and queer villains, I'll never get enough of romance's optimism.<br />
<br />
<b>6. What’s your pet peeve?</b><br />
<br />
In M/M, the rampant internalized misogyny (or just plain old misogyny, in the case of gay men). In queer romance in general, the centring of cis gay men, like no other love stories in the genre matter. And I'd say I likely contribute to that by writing (largely) M/M, myself, but I hope that I'm more on the "genuine attempts at being inclusive" end of the spectrum than the "meaningless lip-service or outright disdain for the LBT" end of things.<br />
<br />
<b>7. What growth would you like to see in the genre, going forward? Any ideas on how to accomplish that?</b><br />
<br />
What I'd love to see is the rise of an actual Queer Romance subgenre. Not just M/M with 0.001% trans content and then F/F (and anything with vaginas) over ---------------> there. I think there's a reason for having stuff that's not M/M be their own genres so that they're not completely subsumed by M/M, (which they pretty much are already, sigh) but on the other hand, I'd love to see a successful queer anthology with mixed orientations portrayed, or a book about a bisexual character who actually has sex with people of different genders, or a queer press with a genuinely mixed catalogue versus the ones we have now that might strive for inclusivity but still mostly specialize. I want to see all the people saying "love is love" about reading M/M standing by those words and reading love stories about all orientations and all kinds of people.<br />
<br />
<b>8. Do you seek out other queer authors when you read? </b><br />
<br />
I read books whose blurbs sound good from publishers I trust to bring me quality content. On the other hand, if I find out an author is queer, I spend a little more time combing through their backlist to see if they've got any books I'm intrigued by, and those books might wind up at the top of my to-read list! I don't write off straight authors, but I definitely want to support my fellow queer authors!<br />
<br />
<b>9. How do you feel, in general, about straight peoples’ participation in reading, writing, and reviewing queer romance?</b><br />
<br />
Straight people likely make up a good chunk of my audience, and I've written with straight co-authors, so yeah, I'm totally fine with straight people in the genre. They have a right to explore the stories that call to them, and a good ally is always welcome.<br />
<br />
On the other hand, expecting back-pats or being overly self-congratulatory, ignoring the criticisms of queer people, or elbowing into queer space or demanding attention from queer readers and organizations, that's not the behaviour of good allies, which I think straight people in this genre ought to be.<br />
<br />
<b>10. Rec us 3 titles in your chosen subgenre and tell us why you love them.</b><br />
<b><br />
</b> <a href="http://riptidepublishing.com/titles/dark-soul-vol-1">Dark Soul by Aleksandr Voinov</a>. It's dark, it's sexy, it's violent, and it includes a gender-bending assassin and a mafia wife who's so much more than she first appears. And hey, bisexuality! Yes!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=2393">Hot Head by Damon Suede</a>. It's sexy, it's over the top, it's a little beyond the realm of belief at times . . . and it's completely heartfelt.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.loose-id.com/the-island.html">The Island by Lisa Henry</a>. Nevermind the beefcake-y cover. This is a fantastic thriller with compelling leads, a great plot-twist, and a sensitive portrayal of two men coming together after terrible trauma.<br />
<br />
<br />
Aaaaaand that's it for me!<br />
<br />
Thanks for reading and for following the tour! Be sure to use the links below to check out more great posts from our participants! Also, if you leave a comment on <b>any</b> of the hop entries, you'll be entered in a chance to win a prize book of print and ebooks from the participating authors! Yay, books!<br />
<br />
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<!-- end InLinkz script -->Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-51132616276418829162013-10-15T09:34:00.001-07:002013-10-15T09:34:45.655-07:00GayRomLit 2013!I'll be there! Tomorrow! At noon-ish (after a cross-continent redeye flight).<br />
<br />
This is me:<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg36MICA4aQHBbUyLX97u_On0FpRus-vFQSS5J92g1pkvM1fJ2OMI9MPaY9rcuooprEjGgJscad85nxIpEBQoQaI8JDRRVyLlOI-rxLuooWkUncrJwFS_fhbSwrAA1O1DOAGdkk-eCYzMs/s1600/Photo+on+2013-10-11+at+7.23+PM.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg36MICA4aQHBbUyLX97u_On0FpRus-vFQSS5J92g1pkvM1fJ2OMI9MPaY9rcuooprEjGgJscad85nxIpEBQoQaI8JDRRVyLlOI-rxLuooWkUncrJwFS_fhbSwrAA1O1DOAGdkk-eCYzMs/s400/Photo+on+2013-10-11+at+7.23+PM.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
I have free books, and also spoopy Canadian Halloween chocolate, so come say hello!<br />
<br />
PS: Have you <a href="http://www.thejeepdiva.com/professors-rule-kink-meme-pt-ii/">voted on what kink Amelia C. Gormley and I will be writing next</a> in <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/series/professors-rule">The Professor's Rule</a>?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-28873975636333760252013-09-30T13:08:00.000-07:002013-09-30T13:08:24.506-07:00Plan the Next Lesson in The Professor's Rule!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.thejeepdiva.com/professors-rule-kink-meme/"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTHSets_BVxkIqsjxYVxLDKAJhfaTxISOasNRYhD7yJ3mrdpeWMGmfaySUrUgagijdrg0pGLMhRxLZ1ZL2-5mI2xUpPmYeVQDPDosnPPv5sgq7yiq5oMNMW6NT7SRNdzVQVS0WGh4dA7U/s320/TPR3ContestA_newsletter.gif" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
The first two instalments of <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/series/professors-rule">The Professor's Rule</a> are out now, but for the third, we thought we'd try something a little different . . .<br />
<br />
Namely, we thought we'd let you (yes you!) pick the kink James and his Professor explore next. From now until October 2nd, you can stop by The Jeep Diva to make suggestions of kinks you'd like to read, either anonymously or no. After the 2nd, Amelia and I will pick our five favourites, and open it up to a vote! The winning vote gets featured in the next instalment of the series. And even if your kink doesn't get picked, just making a suggestion gets you entered in a draw to win a $10 Riptide giftcard.<br />
<br />
What are you waiting for? <a href="http://www.thejeepdiva.com/professors-rule-kink-meme/">Click the gif and get your kink on</a>!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-90007583320122469262013-09-26T21:06:00.000-07:002013-09-27T12:26:58.203-07:00News, news, news!Item One:<br />
<br />
GRL is happening in Atlanta in <i>less than a month</i>! I'll be there. I'm packing sensible shoes. If you can't find me at first, just look for the tubby little Canadian complaining about the heat with eyeliner melting down her face. (This is only slightly a joke.) Seriously, I'll be there and giving out a <b>free book</b> so fiiiind me. Just promise not to punch me over the ending of the last season of Flesh Cartel, okay?<br />
<br />
Item Two:<br />
<br />
Lisa Henry and I have a contract and a release date for our M/M post-apocalyptic <i>King of Dublin</i>, all about a post-pandemic post-economic-crash Ireland that's fallen to anarchy. It's got all of the dark sex and violence and suspense you can expect from Lisa Henry or myself. Oh, and did I mention? It's a big meaty book of 90+k, so if you like me but dislike my penchant for short formats, now's your chance! Look for it next February from Riptide! I'll be posting here when I have coverart/blurb/pre-order info available.<br />
<br />
Item Three:<br />
<br />
I've paid my registration fees and I'm <a href="http://www.rtbookreviews.com/rt-daily-blog/2014-rt-convention-preview-new-lgbtq-track">signed up to speak on an LGBT romance-themed pane</a>l with some Big Fucking Names, so I guess I can say it: I'll be at the RT Booklovers Convention 2014 in New Orleans! I am soooooo excited for this convention and meeting all the awesome Romancelandia folks in M/M and beyond. Should be fun, too, because this convention falls AFTER the release of my first (still queer) M/F! So I'll be there representing myself as Heidi Belleau <i>and</i> Heloise Belleau.<br />
<br />
Item Four:<br />
<br />
Wallflower <a href="http://www.publishersweekly.com:8080/978-1-62649-037-6">got a positive review</a> in Publisher's Weekly! Yes, really! :faints: They called it a "thoughtful exploration of complex gender identity." Talk about ego stroking, right?<br />
<br />
Item Five:<br />
<br />
Speaking of Rear Entrance Video, I'm nearly finished the third in the series, <i>Straight Shooter</i>, which stars none other than Austin! If you haven't seen it yet, here's my (working) blurb:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
This macho jock has a crooked little secret. </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
SFU hockey winger Austin Puett has a big problem: he’s getting kicked out of his place if he doesn’t straighten out his act when it comes to how he’s been treating his flamboyantly gay roommate. And speaking of straight, Austin swears up and down that he is—and he’s got the list of past puck bunny conquests to prove it—but insults implying he’s gay still get him hotter than an entire store’s worth of straight porno. Which, when you’re skating in the ultra-macho world of competitive men’s hockey, happens way too often. And it’s been getting worse. His old methods of coping with his unique problem have all stopped working, and he thinks his roommates and his job at the newly-queer Rear Entrance Video may be to blame. </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
He’s one slur away from losing his home and his job, and one inconvenient boner away from losing the respect of his team. Pure desperation drives him to rent a popular Mischievous Pictures BDSM series about straight men tricked into servicing a male Dominant, all in the hope that giving into his twisted desires will let off some steam and get him back on the straight and narrow again. Instead, it just leaves him craving more, more, more. And he might just get it—because professional dom Puck (real name Liam Williams), who stars in the video, just so happens to be a Rear Entrance Video regular. Meeting the charismatic, assertive Liam in the flesh sends Austin’s addiction to humiliation into overdrive, and Austin himself into Mischievous Pictures Studios looking for an audition. After all, you can be Gay For Pay and still straight . . . can’t you?</blockquote>
Sadly, thanks to my illness the release date of this one is getting pushed back from January to April of next year, but I promise you it'll be worth the wait. It's a sprawling GFY with the unlikely combination of gay BDSM, porn, and college hockey. Austin's a complete asshole, but hopefully this book will help you learn to love him (while still wanting to punch him in the face sometimes). I'm about 4-5 scenes away from finishing up, and hoping to have it in Sarah Frantz's inbox before GRL. Wish me luck! (Or tell me to get the fuck off twitter if you catch me slacking.)<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-48818654572165412732013-09-16T18:22:00.004-07:002013-09-16T18:32:29.336-07:00Eight Things I Learned At GRNW1. If you're going to the gay bar, don't wear heels.<br />
<br />
I went to R Place in Seattle with a bunch of fellow M/M readers and authors. I wore gorgeous but impractical heels. I thought I could drink tequila until my feet stopped hurting, but I ended up just drinking until I got sloppy drunk and I had to pour myself into my hotel bed.<br />
<br />
2. The gogo boys are not your muse.<br />
<br />
Corollary to point 1, after several glasses of wine and several tequila sunrises, a gogo boy named "Danny" introduced himself to me and Anne Tenino. Anne went on with her evening as any spry young woman would. I, however, in my maudlin drunken state, concocted an entire sad backstory for Danny. Good for an angsty m/m contemporary I'm hereby calling "The Lonely Gogo Boy", bad for not being the lady projecting your issues onto a dude who just wants to twerk his way to a paycheque.<br />
<br />
3. The Hotel Monaco is <i>amazing</i>.<br />
<br />
It's clean, it's well designed, the staff is super friendly and they're welcoming in ways you'd never expect: a free wine hour, free cold drinks in the lobby, a yoga mat and umbrella, BIKES? I felt like royalty the entire time I was there. And the food and drinks at the "happy hour" were faboo.<br />
<br />
4. Everyone is beautiful<br />
<br />
Seriously, I spent the entire convention in absolute awe of everyone attending. You were gorgeous, you were funny, you were well-dressed, you had great hair and great leggings and great shoes and great jewelry. I fell in love with everybody!<br />
<br />
5. Meeting new people is dangerous for a compulsive co-writer<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.laylahhunter.com/">Laylah Hunter</a> (whose breathy voice makes sex scenes EVEN SEXIER) and I are on to write some F/F. <a href="http://kaderade.blogspot.ca/">Kade Boehme</a> and I are on to do something gay and filthy that takes advantage of our balls to the wall crazy chemistry. Possibly something to do with my delightful Freudian slip: "Christian Gay".<br />
<br />
6. Let other people have the mic<br />
<br />
Speaking of my Freudian slip, I did my first panel EVER during GRNW and I talked wayyyyyyy too much. Next time I will try and shut my mouth ever so slightly more so other people can speak, too. (Sorry, fellow panelists!) I do think other than the "talking too much" thing, I managed to do decently well, though? It was such a fabulously interesting set of topics to discuss; one I had, uh, a LOT of thoughts on. I can't wait to see how a year's experience and lessons learned will affect all the panels and panelists!<br />
<br />
7. Meeting readers is the BEST FEELING EVER.<br />
<br />
Seriously. I can't even describe how great it is to have someone come up to you and say "I read your book." Even better when it's someone saying "Thank you for writing this." That's why I'm here. That's why I do this. I want to tell stories that satisfy people, make them happy, give them an afternoon's distraction or a little bit of hope. Putting faces to the people I'm sharing this weirdly intimate relationship and exchange of ideas with... it's pretty epic for me. Makes this whole thing real in a way I am never going to forget.<br />
<br />
8. We have a long way to go<br />
<br />
I've talked with several people since the convention looking for more LBT* representation coming from authors, publishers, and panelists. Calls for diversity during panels were met with more than one comment along the lines of "we write people" or "the story has to come first", as if both of those things can't be true when authors are also working towards goals for representation. Audience comments that pointed out the focus on gay cis men at the convention and in queer romance (an issue that affects the LGBT community in general, lbr) were met with "f/f doesn't sell".<br />
<br />
But hey, we're a new genre and GRNW is a new convention, and the overarching feeling for me, at least, was that things are only gonna go up from here. Hearing that the Seattle Public Library had bought <b>two hundred books</b> for its collection was amazing. The call to action, that we bring LGBT romance to the mainstream rather than us waiting for them to finally notice and accept us, was timely and spot on.<br />
<br />
Next year the convention will be on Sept 13th, and I'll try my damnedest to be there again. I wanna meet more people, hear more perspectives, see more gorgeous queer people, read more books, get more swag, and wear more sensible shoes!<br />
<br />
See you in 2014! :D<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-38631354015186609022013-08-05T11:46:00.000-07:002013-08-05T11:47:45.343-07:00Riptide's Back and My Books are On Sale!<a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/">Riptide's new website is finally online!</a> And what better way to return to business then to put a bunch of books up at a nice deep discount?<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/collections/red-hot-rentboys">How about a bundle of rentboys for 60% off</a>? Includes my and Violetta Vane's New Orleans paranormal short story <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/cruce-de-caminos">Cruce de Caminos</a>.<br />
<br />
No? What about some <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/collections/bdsmmmm">BDS-"Mmmm"</a>? You can get <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/giving-inch">Giving an Inch</a> for 60% off, along with some Kim Dare, Aleks Voinov, LAWitt, and Rachel Haimowitz.<br />
<br />
I'm also this month's <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/authors/heidi-belleau">Featured Author</a>, a cushy gig that includes a nice interview but also MORE SALES! <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/giving-inch">Giving an Inch</a> is a mere .99 cents, and the <b>entire first season</b> of <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/collections/flesh-cartel-season-1-damnation">The Flesh Cartel</a> is a paltry $1.99!<br />
<br />
In other news, why not check out my <a href="http://www.heidibelleau.com/p/coming-soon.html">Coming Soon</a> and <a href="http://www.heidibelleau.com/p/wips.html">WIP</a> pages to find out what to expect from me in the future?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-42937980023987544692013-08-01T07:57:00.001-07:002013-08-02T07:02:58.199-07:00Riptide's MakeoverRiptide Publishing is getting a new website! As such, their current site is going to be inaccessible from today until August 4th. Which means you can't access the Apple Polisher blog tour page <i>or </i>buy the book direct from the publisher.<br />
<br />
So here's the complete listing of blog tour stops, and don't forget, every comment earns you a chance to win a week long subscription to CockyBoys or a $15 Riptide gift certificate!<br />
<br />
July 29th: <a href="http://cupoporn.net/2013/07/29/mix-it-up-monday-with-heidi-belleau/">Cup o' Porn: Meet the Boys of Rear Entrance Video</a><br />
July 30th: <a href="http://wonkomance.com/2013/07/30/guest-post-heidi-belleau-on-fucking-up-and-being-a-fuckup/#comment-4415">Wonkomance: On Fucking Up and Being a Fuck Up</a><br />
July 31st: <a href="http://www.thejeepdiva.com/2013/07/review-apple-polisher-rear-entrance-video-1-by-heidi-belleau.html">The Jeep Diva: Five (Weird) Facts about Rear Entrance Video</a><br />
August 1st: <a href="http://www.bookreviewsandmorebykathy.com/2013/08/01/2310/">Book Reviews and More By Kathy: Exclusive Excerpt!</a><br />
August 1st: <a href="http://sidlove.wordpress.com/2013/08/02/guest-post-book-review-apple-polisher-by-heidi-belleau/">The Blog of Sid Love: Working in a Porn Store- The Good, The Bad, The Ugly</a><br />
August 2nd: <a href="http://mrsconditreadsbooks.com/index.php/?p=13630">Mrs. Condit and Friends Read Books</a><br />
<br />
Want to buy the book and can't wait for Riptide to come back? How about purchasing it on <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Apple-Polisher-Entrance-Video-ebook/dp/B00E7FTD0W/">Amazon</a> or <a href="https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-applepolisher-1252118-145.html">ARe</a>?<br />
<br />
Happy release week to me!<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-87675103157458221562013-07-29T09:19:00.000-07:002013-07-29T09:22:18.117-07:00Release Day: Apple Polisher!Hooray, the day is finally here! Did you know I finished Apple Polisher in, like, October of last year? That's a long wait in ebook years to finally get some readers reading my book! (Which is basically ninety percent of the point of this enterprise.) I'm soooooo excited, especially with all the people who have taken the time to tweet me their reactions. I love it! I really hope you check out the book and that you enjoy it, even if Christian does get on your nerves sometimes.<br />
<br />
First off, I got some good reviews!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://shirleyfrancesbooksandmore.wordpress.com/2013/07/29/apple-polisher-rear-entrance-video-1-by-heidi-belleau/">LeAnn's Book Reviews: 4 stars</a><br />
"a fun yet touching read about finding yourself and getting your priorities straight with a whole lot of hot, sexy man-love thrown in to make it an awesome read."<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.bookreviewsandmorebykathy.com/2013/07/29/2298/">Book Reviews and More by Kathy: B</a><br />
"a funny, sexy and thoughtful journey of self-discovery. Heidi Belleau perfectly balances real life issues with plenty of humor."<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.myfictionnook.com/2013/06/arc-review-apple-polisher-by-heidi.html">My Fiction Nook: 4 stars</a><br />
"so much fun"<br />
<br />
<a href="http://thesaucywenchesbookclub.blogspot.ca/2013/06/review-apple-polisher.html">Saucy Wenches Book Club: 4 stars</a><br />
"would make a great beach book for fans of m/m"<br />
<br />
<a href="http://3chicksafterdark.com/2013/07/apple-polisher-by-heidi-belleau/">3 Chicks After Dark:</a><br />
"Her storytelling is engaging, and I really enjoy her laid back, casual writing style."<br />
<br />
<br />
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I'm also on a blog tour! Today, you can <a href="http://cupoporn.net/2013/07/29/mix-it-up-monday-with-heidi-belleau/">stop by Cup-o-Porn to meet the boys of Rear Entrance Video</a>, and be sure to check out <a href="http://wonkomance.com/">Wonkomance</a> tomorrow. For the entire tour schedule (six stops all together!), <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/events/tours/apple-polisher-virtual-book-tour-heidi-belleau">visit Riptide Publishing's website</a>. I'm also giving away your choice of a <a href="http://www.cockyboys.com/movietour/">CockyBoys membership</a> (link NSFW!) or a fifteen dollar Riptide gift card!</div>
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<i>This straight-A student has a dirty little secret.</i></div>
<a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/sites/default/files/styles/2dcover_node/public/2dcovers/apple%20plisher.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/sites/default/files/styles/2dcover_node/public/2dcovers/apple%20plisher.jpg" /></a><br />
<br />
Christian Blake dreams of being a kindergarten teacher, but making the grade means maintaining a squeaky clean image: no drinking, no drugs, no swearing, no sex. And definitely no falling for his new roommate—tattooed bad-boy Max, who may or may not be a drug dealer.<br />
<br />
Most of all, it means no working at a porn store. But Christian’s aunt has cancer, and her beloved Rear Entrance Video will go bankrupt if Christian doesn’t take over managerial duties. Soon enough, Christian finds himself juggling sticky twenty-five cent peep show booths, a blackmailing employee,<br />
and a demanding professor who likes to make an example of him.<br />
<br />
And then there’s Max, who doesn’t know anything about the store, but hates Christian’s preppy sweater vests and the closet Christian forces him into when they’re together. Max just wants Christian to be himself—even though Max is keeping secrets of his own. Christian struggles to find the impossible balance between his real life and the ideal one he thinks a teacher needs to live . . . all while trying to keep his aunt’s dream alive without losing his own.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/apple-polisher-rear-entrance-video-1">Riptide</a> | <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Apple-Polisher-Entrance-Video-ebook/dp/B00E7FTD0W/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1375066918&sr=8-4&keywords=apple+polisher">Amazon</a> | <a href="https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-applepolisher-1252118-145.html">ARe</a> | <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17858897-apple-polisher">Goodreads</a><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-45477392994841434572013-07-19T22:05:00.001-07:002013-07-19T22:05:58.835-07:00Why I Write Queer RomanceOnce upon a time, I was a teenager. I know, I know. It's hard to believe, looking at the confident, composed, and mature late twenties woman standing before you now. Yes, once upon a time I was a teenager. I slammed doors and wrote in my diary about my broken heart and talked back to teachers and rolled my eyes at fast food customers.<br />
<br />
And, like now, I was a writer and a bisexual.<br />
<br />
I wrote <i>constantly </i>as a teenager. Constantly. I'm not saying anything I wrote was very good--because it wasn't, both in terms of technical skill and the fact that I was a huge weeaboo. But hey, we all gotta start somewhere and practice makes . . . better.<br />
<br />
So anyway, I have basically always wanted to be an author and spent a good chunk of my teenager-ly free time writing. I had a couple of "universes" I wrote in, mostly shorts and vignettes, just trying out characterization and attempting to get out the various scenes and scenarios and characters that were gnawing at my brain.<br />
<br />
One issue I always had writing was how so many of my characters veered . . . gay, or bisexual like me. I can think of at least four characters from my main writing who "wanted" to be queer. And do you know what I did?<br />
<br />
I forced them to be straight, even when it sucked, even when the subtext was embarrassingly obvious, even though it went against what I <i>wanted </i>to write.<br />
<br />
Because then, as now, I didn't want to write as "just" a hobby. (I put scarequotes around "just" because I don't think writing as a hobby is in any way lesser, in fact, it's fabulous and I regularly read stuff written purely for the satisfaction of writing and reading and sharing.)<br />
<br />
Teenage me wanted to be a published author, and by my understanding of all the books I had ever read or seen, all the stories on television, in novels, in comics, everywhere, everything I had available to me, featured straight people. So I assumed that queer relationships, whether gay or lesbian or bisexual or including trans* or genderqueer people, weren't publishable. That nobody but me wanted to read them.<br />
<br />
Yeah, of course the logical thing to think would be "If you want it, then somebody else must, too," but it's hard to be logical when you're a confused teenager who feels isolated and weird and like nobody cares about their life or their story. Not seeing yourself represented in media hurts, as anyone in any kind of minority, whether it's racial or ethnic or sexual or related to disability, already knows. It makes you feel like you don't exist, or that if you do, you don't <i>matter</i>. In romance? It means you don't deserve a happy ending.<br />
<br />
So I wrote books with queer characters I forced to be straight, or cut queer characters, or sneakily relegated them to side roles thinking that at least that way, maybe people would forgive it because it's just a small part of the story. It made my writing total shit, and it made <i>me</i> absolutely miserable.<br />
<br />
Of course, fast forward ten years and things have changed. Since I graduated, marriage equality is the law of the land in Canada, and is slowly gaining ground elsewhere. My old high school (where my best friend and I got called "dykes" because we were opinionated and not super feminine) now has a gay-straight alliance. Two of my ex boyfriends came out as gay and are now leading super fulfilling lives.<br />
<br />
And me? I'm a published author, <i>and</i> I get to leave all the gay stuff in! I love writing M/M: it's everything I couldn't allow myself to write when I was a youth and feeling all alone. But more than just my M/M stuff, my ventures into M/F are going to be decidedly queer, too. Because for me, M/F doesn't have to mean heterosexual, and it shouldn't . . . at least not always. My upcoming novel <i>The Dom Project </i>features a bisexual hero (who has on-screen gay interaction!) and a heroine who identifies as straight, but has experimented sexually with women for her own fulfillment--ie: not to titillate men--and isn't ashamed or conflicted about it. My next planned M/F will feature an openly bisexual heroine.<br />
<br />
Every book, I write for me, to make up for every compromise I ever made, to thumb my nose at every hurtful, painful assumption I ever had about literature and media. And damn does it feel good to prove myself wrong.<br />
<br />
Here's to you, younger me. Livin' the dream.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-32436177028369271752013-07-07T21:14:00.000-07:002013-07-07T21:14:13.875-07:00What's Up With Heidi?I realized I haven't really updated on my life/writing in a long time, so I thought I would step down from my Princess Heidi duties and do a general update post. So here's the haps.<br />
<br />
<b>I'm sick.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Not like, with the flu. I have some manner of weird auto-immune thing that I've been dealing with since March/April and still hasn't been diagnosed. Most likely candidate at this juncture seems to be neurosarcoidosis. So that's fun. It's been a lot of ups and downs as flareups get bad enough for me to go to the ER, the ER prescribes me with prednisone, the symptoms go away, and then the prednisone runs out, and then the flareups return (with a vengeance). Last time I was sick I had a horrible painful skin condition, and joint pain, and neuro symptoms (audio-visual hallucinations, headaches), and heart problems, and eye problems. I spent twelve hours in the ER with a tachycardic heart (187 bpm at one point) and a fever of 40C. Then they put me on some heavy duty prednisone, my symptoms vanished, and <i>then </i>I got to see a specialist, who wrote in my file "A perfectly healthy presenting young woman with some very worrying symptoms." He was mad they've just been treating me rather than diagnosing the problem or sending me somewhere that somebody could. So now I have a letter stating that the next time I'm sick enough to get to the ER, they're to transfer me to a proper city hospital where I can be treated and diagnosed by specialists. No more bandaid solutions, woohoo! So right now I'm on the downswing in my health, basically waiting to get bad "enough." Right now I'm miserable, but not ER miserable, so that sucks.<br />
<br />
Luckily I have family in town who are supportive, so I know if I get shipped out my daughter will be cared for. And that I'm a full-time writer thanks to my husband, because I wouldn't have been able to keep up with a teaching job this sick, nor would I have been able to continue teaching if I ultimately have to go on immunosuppressants. Finally, I'm lucky because if I do get flown out, the $10,000 air-vac flight will only cost me $250. This situation sucks, but I'm very aware of the fact that it could be so, so much worse.<br />
<br />
Not that I don't whine. Constantly. I'm currently at the point where I'm very sick for about eight hours a day and functional or sleeping the rest of the time, which I why I'm currently able to write this post. Once I get very sick, I may disappear for a couple of days. Sorry in advance, although I'll try to get word out so nobody worries. And to all of you who've seen my complaining on twitter, thanks for the well-wishes! It means a lot.<br />
<br />
<b>What I'm writing:</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Anyway, thanks to my nasty illness, my writing hasn't been going as well (or as productively) as I'd hoped. I'm hopelessly behind my deadline on the third <i>Rear Entrance Video </i>book, but luckily everyone at Riptide has been really understanding about the fact that it's my illness really mucking things up. (It may also help I delivered the previous two early.) Anyway, I'm hoping once I get a diagnosis and a consistent treatment, REV3 will all come together. In the meantime, I'm plugging away with as much a day (or a week), as I can manage. It's a tough book, surprisingly psychologically complex, but I think it's going to be fabulous if I can pull it off. (If I can't pull it off, Sarah will red-ink it until it does, so I'm not too concerned. It'll work. Somehow.)<br />
<br />
In other writing news, Rachel and I are making progress on Flesh Cartel season 4, which is called . . . (DUH DUH DUHN)<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><i>LIBERATION.</i></b></div>
<b><i><br /></i></b>
Ohhh yes, my little Flesh Cartel (um) fans, it's the big one. That title ain't a tease. (She says, having used headfake titles many times before.) This new season introduces new characters, new settings, and most importantly, a new love interest!!! You guys are gonna die. We're three episodes in, looking at likely five episodes total for the season, but maybe four. We also just submitted the cover art request, so you may wind up seeing some cover-age soon, too!<br />
<br />
In other current writing news, I've been plotting all sorts of things with Sam Schooler, who is awesome. We have two novel ideas: one a little bit literary with a twisted rentboy-meets-secret-garden plot, one an m/f trans* BDSM erotic short, and one a dark dark dark sci-fi with a creepy twist. I've also got a nice story plotted to eventually write with Lisa Henry, a schmoopy holiday-themed contemporary, because, y'know, neither of us wants to write dark ALL the time. (Just most of the time.) However, I can't do any of this until REV3 is finished. So, y'know, bug me to finish it. When I'm not sick. ;P<br />
<br />
<b>What I've got coming out:</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
This month: <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/apple-polisher-rear-entrance-video-1">Apple Polisher</a><br />
August: <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/flesh-cartel-9-trials-and-errors">Flesh Cartel #9</a>, <i>Professor's Rule #2: An Inch at a Time </i>(tentative)<br />
September: <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/flesh-cartel-10-false-gods">Flesh Cartel #10</a><br />
October: <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/wallflower">Wallflower (REV #2)</a><br />
November: (Nothing scheduled as yet, but possibly the start of Flesh Cartel season 4?)<br />
December: <i>The Dom Project</i> (M/F BDSM rom-com, writing as Heloise Belleau with Solace Ames and releasing from Carina Press)<br />
Next year: <i>Straight Shooter (REV#3)</i>, The King of Dublin (post-apocalyptic M/M romance written with Lisa Henry! *squeals*), <i>Blasphemer, Sinner, Saint </i>(M/M gothic horror with Sam Schooler)<br />
<br />
So yeah, there's the haps. Now I'm going to go collapse in bed for ten hours so I can do the fever and pain thing all over again tomorrow. (Groan.) Wish me luck, and by luck, I mean hospitalization-worthy illness!<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-61206759032396495102013-07-03T21:06:00.001-07:002013-07-03T21:15:05.791-07:00Respecting Readers: An Open Letter to JessewaveYeah, yeah, Jesse Wave, we know you don't like vaginas. You don't review M/M/F, or M/M with on-screen M/F or M/M/F sex scenes (even if the main pairing and ultimate HEA is M/M), or trans men with vaginas (even if their vaginas are never mentioned in a sexual context). I think your vagina policies are offensive, not to mention embarrassing coming from someone who otherwise has been a positive force for inclusivity in M/M romance (for example being a strong voice promoting POC characters and characters with disabilities in M/M). But it's your site, and it's your policy. You've allowed reviews of some of my books and disallowed others. I don't seek out reviews of my books from your website, nor do I follow your reviews of other books, but I haven't disowned you entirely. Live and let live. You stick to your part of the internet, and I'll stick to mine.<br />
<br />
Every couple of months you like to remind people of your policies, driven by this need you have to vocally represent the "majority" of M/M readers who you say don't want to read vaginas either. Usually I subtweet you a bit with my fellow vagina-lovers but don't otherwise engage or acknowledge. But man, today you really got up in my craw with <a href="http://t.co/2dWnXLDNlY">this</a>:<br />
<blockquote>
<i>the M/M genre is supposed to be for romances between gay men, unless things have changed while I wasn’t looking.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>At this point I can only assume that some of our writers — and/or their publishers — don’t respect or care about M/M readers; if they did they wouldn’t insert into their M/M romances on-page het physical intimacies such as oral sex, full-on vaginal sex, or anal sex, with no warning in the blurbs.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>...</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>Why are M/M readers treated so disdainfully? Are we not on par with het romance readers? M/M romance has been around for a decade, so why can’t our authors get it right? Clearly we are not respected because if we were this wouldn’t happen, and so often. Would authors insert graphic gay sex scenes in het romances? Not f*****g likely, unless the book is a ménage or a bi romance, and do you know why? Two reasons:</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>1) They know that het romance readers would not tolerate this and would tell them to put their book where the sun doesn’t shine; and</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>2) They respect het romance readers so it wouldn’t even occur to them to include gay sex in a het romance. Definitely a double standard.</i></blockquote>
Okay, let's leave aside her assertion that no author would ever include gay sex scenes in "het" romances. I know that's not true--after all, my first M/F novel coming out with Carina this December has a bisexual hero in an on-screen sexual relationship with a man--as do plenty of other queer or ally readers/reviewers/writers of M/F romance who know what they're talking about and read widely in the genre. Are there het readers and writers who get angry about gay sex? Yes, but they're what we call bigots. I don't write for bigots, full stop. I don't read authors if I learn that <i>they </i>write for bigots. And really, "But bigots do it!" is a terrible defence for your own behaviour. So there goes that. The "double standard" is a false construction Wave is waving around like a red flag to try and keep the conversation from rightfully including her clear internalized misogyny, transphobia, and biphobia.<br />
<br />
So now that I've taken care of that piece of nonsense, I'd like to talk about this accusation she's levelled at me, and at authors like me: that we <b>don't respect or care about readers</b> and that we're <b>treating readers disdainfully </b>by including the occasional M/F relationship or sex scene in our otherwise M/M novels.<br />
<br />
Well, let me set the record straight. I respect the <b>hell </b>out of you guys. I love you. I care about you. I adore you. I want to make you happy. I have buckets of respect for you. You're my entire livelihood. You're my raison d'être. Jesse Wave is not my reader, and that's bloody fine by me.<br />
<br />
Jesse Wave says respect begins and ends at vaginas. To me, respect looks a little differently. . .<br />
<br />
<b>1. I work with publishers I know are going to edit the hell out of my work. </b><br />
<br />
You guys deserve a polished product. You paid for it, and hell, even when it's free, the time you spend reading still counts as far as I'm concerned. Venessa Guinta at Loose Id, Sarah Frantz and Rachel Haimowitz at Riptide, they put my stories through the ringer, and that's why I choose (and have chosen) to work with them. Yes, editing to that standard is hard fucking work, but I respect you enough to put that work in. Period.<br />
<br />
<b>2. I keep my nose out of reader spaces.</b><br />
<br />
I don't harass reviewers for not liking my books. I don't encourage other people to harass reviewers for not liking my books. I don't comment publicly on reviews, for the most part. I try my best not to spam or add you to mailing lists you didn't agree to or send you annoying event invitations on GR or FB. If I participate in GR groups or twitter conversations, I try not to spend the entire time shilling.<br />
<br />
<b>3. I give back.</b><br />
<br />
I write free stories for you, and I love it. I write stories based on requests, sometimes I consider reader input when I'm writing stories (for example, "Salting the Earth" came from people reading the WIP snippets of <i>The Druid Stone </i>on my blog saying "OMG Finnbheara non-con I want it!"), I write PWP of characters from my series and sell them at a loss, I release deleted scenes or short vignettes that don't go in a novel but might be interesting to fans of my books. Is this self-serving? Of course, it's great marketing! But then, so is everything on this list, ultimately, because respecting your readers sells books on the whole. I truly believe that. Being a jerk benefits no one.<br />
<br />
But more than that, I respect this genre enough to try and better it in any way I can. I think it needs to be more diverse, so I write books with diverse characters. I think it needs higher standards of editing, I only submit to houses with editors I know I can trust. I think it needs nice covers, I spend time going over and over again with cover artists until I get something representative and attractive. (Um, mostly. But then, art's subjective!) Ultimately, I try my best to be a part of the genre <i>I want</i> M/M to be. Professional, fun, sexy, smart, inclusive. All of it. I'm doing my best.<br />
<br />
<b>4. I love hearing you love my work.</b><br />
<br />
Seriously, it fills me with joy when you @ me on twitter, or I see your thoughtful or gushing (or both!) review of one of my books on Goodreads. You know why that feels so good to me? Because I respect your opinion. Your opinion <b>matters</b>, and seeing you happy makes me happy. If I don't respect you--cough, Jesse Wave--then your opinion doesn't matter. It doesn't affect my mood, it doesn't change how I write or conduct business. It's as simple as that.<br />
<br />
<b>5. Above all else, I put the story first.</b><br />
<br />
Because you guys deserve the best books I can write. Writing good books means putting the story--not the opinions of anyone else--first. Do I take your thoughts into consideration? Hell yeah I do. You like romantic comedy from me? I write you romantic comedy! You like that series? I write you some more of it! But only if it serves the story. Only if I can make it work. That means I don't write sex just because it sells, I write it because it fits the story. POC characters? Female characters? No sex? Lots of sex? Sex with ladyparts? Flashbacks? Action scenes?<br />
<br />
It's all done with the primacy of the story in mind. Do I sometimes get it wrong? Yeah, of course. Sometimes I cut a sex scene that shouldn't have been cut. Sometimes I drag out an arc that needs to be kept shorter. But I do these things as genuine mistakes and with the best of intentions, <i>not </i>because I'm trying to manipulate, or make more money, or insult you or disrespect/disdain you, or even pander to you, or any of it.<br />
<br />
<b>The story comes first, because you deserve that.</b><br />
<br />
And that's what respecting readers looks like to me.<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-28496053586089941302013-06-14T07:08:00.000-07:002013-06-14T07:08:07.736-07:00A Free Story for you! "#First Impressions #Second Chances" now available!Good news everyone! My free short story for the <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/group/show/20149-m-m-romance">M/M Romance group on Goodreads</a> is now available to the public in your choice of formats!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.mmromancegroup.com/?p=2582">#First Impressions #Second Chances</a> is a love story on Tumblr, based on a user-selected image and prompt, and now it's available for everyone to read and enjoy. Here's the blurb:<br />
<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: #fff7f8; color: #5f5f5f; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px;">
Jonah Gilchrist lives a double life. On the internet, he’s a tumblr celebrity with thousands of dedicated followers. Readers from all over the world come for his fashion advice and designer menswear Outfit of the Day pictures, but stay for Jonah’s adorkable commentary. In the real world, things aren’t quite so rosy. Here, being an awkward gay virgin isn’t cute and endearing, it’s a target on his back; which was why five years ago Jonah dropped out of junior high in order to be homeschooled instead. Now that he’s starting university, though, he’s determined to redefine himself and start fresh. One problem: it’s hard to start fresh when you’re sharing classes with your ill-fated junior high crush. </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: #fff7f8; color: #5f5f5f; font-family: Georgia, Utopia, 'Palatino Linotype', Palatino, serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px;">
<a href="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8e2btqTK61rtrvymo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; color: #959595; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-decoration: none;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8e2btqTK61rtrvymo1_500.jpg" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0976563) 1px 1px 5px; background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; border: 1px solid rgb(242, 242, 242); box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0976563) 1px 1px 5px; padding: 5px; position: relative;" width="320" /></a>Sebastian Rose, with his easy-going manner and great sense of humor, was one of the most likeable and popular guys in school. He was also one of the only people who didn’t join in on torturing Jonah. Is it any wonder Jonah wound up with a huge crush on the guy? Too bad Sebastian’s kindness toward Jonah was only ever pity, not because he ever returned Jonah’s hapless feelings.<br /><br />Bumping into each other again after all these years makes it seem like the universe itself wants to give Jonah a second chance at his first love. But if his out of town university and his tumblr persona are all about reinventing himself—a new glamorous popular self to replace the bullied boy he once was—then how can he ever hope to move forward when Sebastian’s presence just pulls him further into his past? Of course, sometimes just when we think we’re moving forward is when we’re not really going anywhere new at all.</blockquote>
<br />
Interested? Read the original prompt and <b>download it for free <a href="http://www.mmromancegroup.com/?p=2582">here</a></b>! You can also <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18046837-first-impressions-second-chances?ac=1">add it to your shelves</a> on Goodreads.<br />
<br />
And if you liked this free story, be sure to <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/group/membership/20149-m-m-romance">join the M/M Group</a> for more!<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-17809707390556558962013-05-30T01:00:00.000-07:002013-06-11T18:51:09.282-07:00On Fucking Up and Being a Fuck UpSo I posted my <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/wallflower">latest cover and blurb reveal</a> on tumblr the other day.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/sites/default/files/styles/2dcover_node/public/2dcovers/Wallflower_500x750.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/sites/default/files/styles/2dcover_node/public/2dcovers/Wallflower_500x750.jpg" /></a>In case you're not on my tumblr/other social media or you didn't click the above link, the book was <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/wallflower">Wallflower</a>, which comes out from Riptide in October and is the second in the <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/universe/rear-entrance-video">Rear Entrance Video</a> series, all about an unlikely group of roommates who wind up running a porn store. Wallflower is the story of a really shy geeky kid who has resolved to make friends and relate with people better, and comes to an unusual conclusion as to how he goes about it. (Spoilers, he dresses up as a cute girl.)<br />
<br />
So anyway, I posted the cover and blurb on tumblr and it got reblogged and I got notes and one of the notes had a comment attached by the person reblogging that can be best summed up as "wary, but intrigued." I won't link the post because I'm not Anne Rice, but the jist of it was "X looks questionable, plot looks good, but it depends on how it's executed."<br />
<br />
In other words, "Yeah it looks great in theory but there's a lot of potential for her to fuck it up."<br />
<br />
And at first I was . . . dismayed! "I tried really hard on this book!" I cried. "I promise, I worked really hard to write a sensitive and nuanced portrayal of trans* issues and gender presentation and crossdressing and how they intersect and I'm queer and I promise I didn't fuck it up!" I pleaded. "I had beta readers!" I finished, quite pathetically.<br />
<br />
Um, not in reply to the post because that's rude, but I yelled them at my screen because I'm really emotional after my near death experience yesterday okay.<br />
<br />
And then I stopped and thought about it and went . . . wait. Yes, this is the exact reaction I should hope to be getting from my books, and here's why.<br />
<br />
<b>Because <i>there is</i> a big chance of me fucking up. </b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I mean, I'm white, I'm cis, I'm bisexual but I'm in a straight relationship, which comes with attendant privileges. And here I am writing a series that has followed a gay first generation Canadian from Jamaica, an outspoken Inuit comic artist with white parents, and of course Rob, my gender-experimenting Chinese-Canadian.<br />
<br />
Now, I've been writing POC since I got into this game. When <a href="http://violettavane.com/">Violetta Vane</a> and I sat down to write <i><a href="http://ebooks.carinapress.com/A4640B1E-21BE-46B2-A7DA-BF901B00E00A/10/134/en/ContentDetails.htm?ID=89DB7CC1-2E21-4135-93E6-12A17571A2B5">The Druid Stone</a> </i>we pretty much simultaneously said to one another, we should do an interracial relationship. And then we did. And then we kept doing it. We liked it, it was interesting and fun and a challenge to write different voices and cultures, it was a drawing point for readers. . . Romance as a genre is still a pretty damn white place, and M/M slightly less so I'd say but still with the visible problem that a lot of the POC characters are less there as genuine representation versus for "spice" b/c ethnicity X,Y,Z is "sexy", AKA adding a new flavour of fetishization to the M/M fetishization pie. (Not naming names, but there are a few books about Asian characters that particularly bother me on this front.)<br />
<br />
So anyway, I've been writing M/M with interracial and multicultural elements for several books now, and I couldn't be happier. I'm proud of what I'm doing, I find it fun and challenging and just RIGHT. I mean, on the point of Rear Entrance Video and why it's so diverse: it's not because I'm trying to recreate the glory days of 90s Captain Planet-style cartoon tokenism, it's because Vancouver is a diverse, multicultural city and I wanted to represent that in these books. Think of it as an <a href="http://www.racialicious.com/2012/04/19/dear-lena-dunham-i-exist/">anti-</a><i><a href="http://www.racialicious.com/2012/04/19/dear-lena-dunham-i-exist/">Girls</a> </i>policy.<br />
<br />
But all this time, I've been writing with a WOC co-writer who not only has the life experience of, y'know, growing up Asian-American, but has also dedicated a lot of her time and energy to educating herself about racial issues and racial politics and participating in activism that follows those learnings. In other words, she knows her shit. I do my best and I think I'm pretty keen for a 1. white girl, 2. a white girl from an overwhelmingly white upbringing, but let's face it, I'm still a lowly worm in comparison to her.<br />
<br />
<i>Rear Entrance Video</i> isn't co-written though. It's all mine. Sure, Violetta beta read the books for me because she's my friend and a damn good beta and I need her. I mean, for sentence level stuff and for bouncing plot ideas off of, not just the racial stuff. She pointed out places where I'd inadvertently written lines that were offensive, or pointed out double-meanings to things that I may not have been aware of. (For example, Rob refers to himself as "Asian, so I'm pretty small", and Violetta was the one to point out the power of the "so" in that sentence and how it would read, and in light of that would I change it to "and" or leave it?) This is the kind of nuance that I'm just never going to grasp as a white person. I empathize and listen and ask questions when appropriate, but ultimately, an outsider's knowledge is always going to be lesser.<br />
<br />
So you know, on these books I did my best, just like I've always tried to do. But make no mistakes, these are the books of a white woman. In the case of the second book, the fact that I'm cis comes into play, as well. I'm writing as an outsider, and that means I will fuck up. Maybe my fuck up will get caught before the book goes to press, maybe it won't. (So don't blame Violetta; she's amazing, but she's not a magic racial-fuck-up-fairy-godmother and expecting her to be is not cool. I don't expect her to be, and neither should you. My mistakes are mine. Always.)<br />
<br />
And living by my own standards, doing your best (definition: writing good books about all sorts of different people that make readers fall in love and care and that make you feel good to write them) means acknowledging that yes, you will fuck up. You might fuck up in a small forgivable way, or you might fuck up in a big terrible way that is going to hurt people or make them angry and swear off you and your books. Every conversation about lack of representation gets the same response from a certain subset of authors though: "I'm white and I'd love to write POC but I know I'll get something wrong and then people will be angry at me and I don't want people to be angry at me" and sometimes it's kind of sad and genuine like oh that's so wrongheaded but I get why you're nervous and sometimes it's just racist like "oh minorities are so damn angry all the time they want me to write them but they want me to write them PROPERLY ugh just take what you can get or TAKE NOTHING" and white cis straight authors of the world who have ever said a variation of this to justify the lack of diversity in your books I WANT YOU TO THINK LONG AND HARD ON YOUR MOTIVATIONS RIGHT NOW.<br />
<br />
So once on Dear Author we were having the conversation about "why no POC heroes/heroines in romance, authors?" and white authors were weighing in on the ole "fear of screwing up" chestnut and I realized . . . M/M authors say this very same thing to justify the whiteness of the genre. Meanwhile, gay men have been complaining since the advent of women writing dudes fucking/loving that they think M/M is fetishizing and othering and disrespectful etc. Which it most certainly can be. And yet . . . we write it. We write REAMS of it, whether it makes a certain subset of gay men angry at us or not. Whether they yell at us or not. Why? Because we like it. We like it enough that the fear of fucking up or of making someone angry doesn't overcome our urge to write. If we're callous we just don't give a shit about gay men, and if we're kind we try to incorporate and acknowledge those mens' opinions and critiques and just do a good job while still writing what we like. So where goes that bravery when we have a chance to write another minority, be it racial or religious or political or otherwise? Where's our stated love of diversity then?<br />
<a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/sites/default/files/styles/2dcover_node/public/2dcovers/apple%20plisher.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/sites/default/files/styles/2dcover_node/public/2dcovers/apple%20plisher.jpg" /></a><br />
So here's a secret: I almost made Christian (of <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/apple-polisher-rear-entrance-video-1">Apple Polisher</a>) white. Without Violetta co-writing, I was genuinely concerned that I couldn't write a POC character, and that I'd suck and it would piss people off and <i>wouldn't it just be easier for everybody</i> . . .<br />
<br />
And I could have "gotten away with it", too. I mean, his race is inherent to his character as the book exists so no it's not a "colour blind" story, but it has no bearing on the plot as I originally sketched it out, either. A student teacher being afraid to manage a porn store could be any race. And then I asked: well in that case, why not make him a POC? And the only answer I had for myself came down to fear. I was afraid of fucking up.<br />
<br />
But in the end, I couldn't be a coward with Christian, or Rob, or Dylan, or any of the other characters in REV who are many and strange and I love them all. I can't criticize <i>Star Trek</i> and <i>Girls</i> out one side of my mouth and write safe white boys out the other... side. Of my mouth. Okay that metaphor didn't work.<br />
<br />
So here's my statement:<br />
<br />
<b>I have tried my best not to fuck up</b>. I am fucking terrified of fucking up. Of making people angry at me yes, but also of hurting people who don't need to be hurt anymore. I have also accepted that <b>I will fuck up at some point</b>. Not may. Will. Maybe it's something minor, maybe it's something huge. Maybe it's something harmless, maybe it's . . . not. I really hope it's never not harmless, I do. But when I am wrong about anything, big or small, feel however you feel about it, and react (pretty much) however you wish. Be angry, or be kind and nurturing of my tiny author flower petal feelings. Tell me what's wrong and try to educate, or just blast me in a review and warn your friends away from me. <b>You're the reader and I have accepted that your reactions to my books are your own, you have a right to them, and you have a right to express them however you like wherever you like</b> as long as you're not poisoning my cats or threatening me/my family with bodily harm.<br />
<br />
I have also accepted that if the choices are between:<br />
<br />
<ol>
<li>being a coward and maintaining the status quo </li>
<li>trying really hard and still fucking up</li>
</ol>
<br />
<br />
Then I will choose fucking up.<br />
<br />
<b>At least you can learn from fuck ups. You can't learn anything from not trying at all.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
ETA:<br />
Continued Reading (feel free to send links!)<br />
<a href="http://whatever.scalzi.com/2009/03/13/mary-anne-mohanraj-gets-you-up-to-speed-part-ii/">Mary Ann Mohanraj Gets You Up To Speed Part II</a><br />
<a href="http://richincolor.com/2013/05/five-wrong-headed-reasons-for-not-writing-diverse-characters-in-science-fiction/">Five Wrongheaded Reasons for Not Writing Diverse Characters in Science Fiction</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-10845694760051448102013-04-16T21:14:00.001-07:002013-04-16T21:18:52.591-07:00WIP Wednesday: Blood OathHello friends! How's your April going? Mine has been busy, busy, busy! I've been taking my daughter to twice-weekly swimming lessons, which has been an absolute blast (although terrible on my hair), my and <a href="http://ameliacgormley.com/">Amelia C. Gormley</a>'s new short story <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/giving-inch">"Giving an Inch" was released</a> (stay tuned for blog tour details!), I've been finishing off edits on <i>Rear Entrance Video 1: Apple Polisher</i>, writing a freebie short solo, and (drumroll please!) a dark, dark, dark post-apocalyptic story set in Ireland with <a href="http://lisahenryonline.blogspot.ca/">Lisa Henry</a>, who write one of my fave M/M books of 2012.<br />
<br />
I thought I'd share a little snippet with you here, just to whet your appetites. I love these two heroes, and the story's villain, the mad King of Dublin. Meet all three after the jump.<br />
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The room was massive. A place for giants, Darragh thought. It dwarfed him, and the men with him. It even dwarfed the man who waited for him in the dome-ceiling alcove at the room’s end, past the lit fireplaces with the soot-stained tapestries hanging above them, and a pair of huge columns. Darragh walked the length of the dirty carpet with the king’s men on either side of him, skirting the large table that took up much of the floorspace. </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">They reached the alcove, and one of the men pushed Darragh forward. “Culchie scavenger, boss.” </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Found him in the hospital,” another added.</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The rounded end of the room was actually a raised dais of black and white marble, two steps above the ratty carpet where Darragh and the king’s men stood. The king himself lounged on what appeared to be a filthy red cushion sitting in the dais’s center, in a position that called for someone to be fanning him or feeding him grapes. He was a small, sharp-faced man with a wicked childish smile and black, glittering eyes, wearing a massive golden collar like a pharaoh's.</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“And what were you hoping to steal from your king?” the king asked, the question arch as if he’d rehearsed it.</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Not steal,” Darragh said. “I didn’t know.” </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“You didn’t know what?” the king asked him. </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh twisted his mouth in frustration. “I didn’t know there was a king.” </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The king looked offended. “You </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">didn’t know there was a king</span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">? Are you simple?”</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“No. I travel. No king in my home.”</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Of course you have a king. The king of Dublin is the king of all Ireland.”</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh opened his mouth to argue that they’d never heard of him in Cúil Aodha, king or no, and then it occurred to him that maybe he didn’t want this man to know the name of his home. Not to mention he seemed the sort of man who wouldn’t take such a statement with good grace. “I didn’t know,” he said again. </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Did you travel far?”</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“A long way,” Darragh replied. “Days.” </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The king looked more closely at him. He had a shrewd gaze. Darragh wondered what kind of man he must have been in the days before. “How did you get here?” </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“I walked.” </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“You </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">walked</span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">?”</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh nodded, and wondered why the king sounded so surprised. What other ways were there? He remembered with sudden clarity a children’s picture book his mother used to read him, each page glossy and colourful. Buses and planes and cars and ships and boats and bicycles. Darragh hadn’t had any of those, and he couldn’t risk taking a horse, not when the others depended on the beasts to do the farming and heavy lifting. He had perfectly good legs.</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“There were no bandits on the road?”</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Maybe.”</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The king arched his brows. “</span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Maybe?</span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">” </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Maybe there were bandits. Maybe they didn’t bother me because I’m big.”</span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Too big for bandits, he says!” The king’s men all laughed on cue. “No, I’ll tell you why. Because I’ve made it safe again, that’s why. Because even though big dumb culchies like yourself don’t know it, the roads you travelled are under the king’s protection!” </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh didn’t know what to say to that. He didn’t think it was true, but he’d be as dumb as the king thought he was if he said it aloud. He hadn’t met anyone on the road, not bandits and not the king’s men. But he’d also kept off the road whenever he could. After all, he may not know much, but he knew that the garda had gone from Ireland, and without them surely the criminals would have the run of the place. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Perhaps the king was a criminal himself. A king of criminals. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The king’s smile faded, all playfulness vanishing from his expression. “But you never did say, culchie, what you wanted at the hospital.” </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Medicine,” Darragh said, remembering again why he was here. A king, a criminal, or both. What did it matter if the man had medicine? </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Are you sick?” the king asked.</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh sighed. He was tired of having this conversation already. “For home. For the winter, so nobody dies.” </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The king spread his arms magnanimously. “What medicine do you need, then?” In in contradiction to his body language, however, his smile was back: that teasing, cruel smile. If the king was a boy in a man’s body, then Darragh imagined him as the sort of boy who pulled the wings from flies.</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Maybe he thought Darragh was an idiot who wouldn’t know the answer, but Darragh didn’t hesitate. “Anti-virals. For the flu.” </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He wasn’t a fool. He was on a fool’s errand maybe, but he wasn’t a fool. He and some of the others had pored over the books left in the tiny village library, learning what they could when they weren’t working. Farming, first aid, carpentry, husbandry, sewing, all skills that their ancestors had known but that they had forgotten. Well, they remembered now. They took what they could from the books, and the rest they learned by experience. Hard-won, sometimes deadly experience. Last year six had died of the flu. This year, they had the knowledge to be prepared. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Very well, then. I’m a generous king. I’ll give you what you require . . . in return for your service, that is.”</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“My service?”</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Why, yes. I’m generous, I’m not a </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">charity</span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. You’ll get your medicine, but you’ll work for it.” </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh drew a breath. “For how long?” </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The king raised his eyebrows. “Impertinent, aren’t you? Don’t worry, you’ll be home before winter.” </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh didn’t want to push his luck, but he had to ask. “What would I have to do?” </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The king narrowed his eyes. His face twisted. “What you would have to </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">do</span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, culchie, is whatever the </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">fuck </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I tell you to do.” His voice rose, echoing in the vaulted alcove. “You can go home before winter, or not go home at all! After all, you were trespassing on the king’s property with intention to </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">steal</span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> from the king.” </span></span></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A frisson of fear chased up Darragh’s spine. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then, as quickly as it had appeared, the king’s anger was gone. He relaxed back onto the cushion. “A big brute like you, you’ll put the fear of God into your king’s enemies, won’t you?” </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“I will,” Darragh said, knowing there was no other answer he could give. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Good man. I knew you’d come around.” The king extended a hand. “Boy! My knife!”</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh stiffened, fists clenching at the word. </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Knife. </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But no, the king wanted his aid, and he’d agreed. No reason to kill him now.</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He twisted his head as movement distracted him. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A shadow in one of the dark oak alcoves set into the king’s wall had solidified into the childlike shape of a young man. He must have been there the whole time, waiting to be summoned for whatever the hell this was. He was lean, but pampered looking, shirtless and glittering with gold. Gold armbands around his small biceps, gold cuffs around his wrists, a gold torque at the hollow of his throat. None of it, though, quite compared to the gold of his hair. Even inside this grim, shadowed room it seemed to gleam. In the sunlight, Darragh thought, it would burn. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The boy approached the king silently, balancing a knife in his raised, uplifted palms. He knelt at the king’s side with it. The king’s pet? A lover? Well, Darragh supposed, a king could do what he liked. And who he liked. It wasn’t any of Darragh’s concern. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The knife certainly fucking was. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Kneel on the stair, culchie, and take off your shirt.”</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh glanced anxiously at the king’s men, but their shuttered faces didn’t give him any comfort. He raised his fingers to the mismatched buttons on his shirt, and fumbled with them for a while. Then he shrugged the shirt off, screwed his courage, and went down onto his knees. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The king leered and sat forward. “What do you think of him, Boy?”</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Boy’s face was as shuttered as the others’. “Very big, your majesty.”</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darragh grimaced. They kept saying that, but it wasn’t like he was a freak. His father had been this size, and so had most of his uncles. On both sides. He had the body of a man shaped by hard work. Maybe they just bred them small and rat-like in Dublin. That was another thing he’d probably be better off not saying aloud. </span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The king took the knife from Boy’s hands and twirled it thoughtfully in the air. “State your name, culchie, and swear loyalty to the king.”</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Darragh</span><span style="font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Fearghal Anluan, of Cork. I swear loyalty to the king of Dublin,” Darragh recited, held in a trance by the glint of the knife as it twisted and caught the firelight.</span></span></b></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.15; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-indent: 27pt;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He hissed as the blade made contact with his skin, and was aware of one of the king’s men grabbing his shoulders to hold him still. Darragh was bleeding before he even realised the blade had cut him. The pain was sudden, sharp, and then it was over; the blade had sliced a thin, shallow path down his chest, no more than a hands breadth long, above his heart. The man holding his shoulders released him, and Darragh pressed his hand to the wound, staring wide-eyed at the king. </span></span></b></div>
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.01147992187179625"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“A blood oath,” the king said. “Sworn and witnessed. Welcome to the ranks of the king’s men.” </span></span></b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-77092884156232149372013-04-09T14:28:00.000-07:002013-04-09T14:28:31.448-07:00Freebies and contracts and sales, oh my!Just a quick little news post to keep you up to date on this snowy Monday.<br />
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Item 1:<br />
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The contracts are signed and it's official! My first M/F novel, written as Heloise Belleau with co-writer Solace Ames, will be coming out from Carina Press in late December. It's a bisexual BDSM rom-com with no millionaires and an intelligent, self-sufficient heroine, not to mention a serious shoe fetish, a trove of vintage pornography, and a snarky blog. And it's friends-to-lovers, too. It's called <i>The Dom Project</i> (working title, not sure if it'll still be known as such come release day), and you can read all about it on my <a href="http://www.heidibelleau.com/p/coming-soon.html">Coming Soon</a> page.<br />
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Item 2:<br />
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Abigail Roux won the DABWAHA tournament! It's awesome to see an M/M romance beat out mainstream bestsellers to win the title, purely thanks to fan enthusiasm and love. Awesome!<br />
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To celebrate, my publisher <a href="http://riptidepublishing.com/news/dabwaha-backlist">Riptide are having a sale</a>: 30% off all backlist titles, and 50% off select "Editor's Picks", including a couple of mine! Both <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/flesh-cartel-1-capture">episode 1 of Flesh Cartel</a> and <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/mark-gladiator">Mark of the Gladiator</a> are now half off, but only until the 15th of April, so get 'em quick!<br />
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And congratulations to Abigail Roux and to M/M romance in general! Yay!<br />
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Item 3:<br />
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It's that time of year again! The <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/group/show/20149-m-m-romance">M/M Romance group on Goodreads</a> is having their yearly free story event. I'm participating, of course, and snapped up a great, sweet contemporary prompt and picture, which I'm now in the midst of writing. The title is a secret, but here's the working blurb. I'm also <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/1252428-dear-author---jilly----claimed-by-heidi-belleau">posting weekly teaser snippets</a>, but you'll have to <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/group/membership/20149-m-m-romance">join the group</a> to read those!<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Jonah Gilchrist lives a double life. On the internet, he’s a tumblr celebrity with thousands of dedicated followers. Readers from all over the world come for his fashion advice and designer menswear Outfit of the Day pictures, but stay for Jonah’s adorkable commentary. In the real world, things aren’t quite so rosy. Here, being an awkward gay virgin isn’t cute and endearing, it’s a target on his back; which was why five years ago Jonah dropped out of junior high in order to be homeschooled instead. Now that he’s starting university, though, he’s determined to redefine himself and start fresh. One problem: it’s hard to start fresh when you’re sharing classes with your ill-fated junior high crush. </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<a href="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8e2btqTK61rtrvymo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8e2btqTK61rtrvymo1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a>Sebastian Rose, with his easy-going manner and great sense of humor, was one of the most likeable and popular guys in school. He was also one of the only people who didn’t join in on torturing Jonah. Is it any wonder Jonah wound up with a huge crush on the guy? Too bad Sebastian’s kindness toward Jonah was only ever pity, not because he ever returned Jonah’s hapless feelings.<br /> <br />Bumping into each other again after all these years makes it seem like the universe itself wants to give Jonah a second chance at his first love. But if his out of town university and his tumblr persona are all about reinventing himself—a new glamorous popular self to replace the bullied boy he once was—then how can he ever hope to move forward when Sebastian’s presence just pulls him further into his past? Of course, sometimes just when we think we’re moving forward is when we’re not really going anywhere new at all.</blockquote>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-73403652785219538452013-03-21T06:56:00.000-07:002013-03-21T06:56:06.679-07:00New Cover Art! Giving an InchCheck it out, readers! Here's the gorgeous new cover art by <a href="http://www.lcchase.com/design.htm">L.C. Chase</a> for my and <a href="http://www.ameliacgormley.com/">Amelia C. Gormley</a>'s new kinky erotic comedy short, <i>Giving an Inch</i>.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia6JRLJGAi6RbML7q7Mrfajd5vIGhIIakhS7qyZTFYZefdHvgCPlBTuzllCR018W_Etzbkvfb8CYE3TGuiRpceYhAmBSmzvF2A1NP-H4hM_w5tPpGE7LsOL4_zocs8RMClKBP_7PxbRMA/s1600/GivingAnInch_500x750.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia6JRLJGAi6RbML7q7Mrfajd5vIGhIIakhS7qyZTFYZefdHvgCPlBTuzllCR018W_Etzbkvfb8CYE3TGuiRpceYhAmBSmzvF2A1NP-H4hM_w5tPpGE7LsOL4_zocs8RMClKBP_7PxbRMA/s640/GivingAnInch_500x750.jpg" width="425" /></a></div>
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Releases April 15th. <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/giving-inch">Pre-order it now</a>, or <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17616739-giving-an-inch">add it on Goodreads</a>!</div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-24549072606807508752013-03-16T11:23:00.001-07:002013-03-16T11:23:45.609-07:00Get away to Ireland this St. Paddy's dayIt's that time of year again! Saint Paddy's day. Here in Northern BC it's wicked cold and snowy, hardly parade and cold (green) beer weather, so I thought I'd leave a few helpful suggestions on how to warm up, Irish style.<br />
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First up, you'll want to get my father-in-law's <a href="http://www.heidibelleau.com/2012/03/happy-st-paddys-day-beef-and-guinness.html">Guinness and beef stew</a> on a nice simmer.<br />
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Next, load up your e-reader with a few sexy Irish M/M erotic romances by yours truly!<br />
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<i>Salting the Earth</i><br />
Looking for something edgier, with sexy but deadly sidhe kings? Closeted young Irishman Ronan returns from a disastrous year abroad work program to discover his twin sister has been spending every night with the fairies of Knockma mound. Sidhe king Finnbheara agrees to return her . . . but at a terrible price.<br />
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Buy it from <a href="http://www.stormmoonpress.com/books/Like-It-Or-Not.aspx">Storm Moon Press</a>.</blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLhRnPdIWgLrPrCPdlub65dG5cfbb92U0Ys1dGNe5fAVyS052INfnjTxV94E4sgB3ShqL-hGnl42ekzgTV8S40PKhZ1Nfs8Ck0p9h1jt4gWqFumztuTaiEOreZDYWNjwF2HHlHwD4U02w/s1600/TheDruidStoneFinal.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLhRnPdIWgLrPrCPdlub65dG5cfbb92U0Ys1dGNe5fAVyS052INfnjTxV94E4sgB3ShqL-hGnl42ekzgTV8S40PKhZ1Nfs8Ck0p9h1jt4gWqFumztuTaiEOreZDYWNjwF2HHlHwD4U02w/s320/TheDruidStoneFinal.jpg" width="202" /></a></div>
<i>The Druid Stone</i><br />
Epic urban fantasy more your flavour? Cursed Irish-Cuban-American Sean O'Hara travels to Ireland in order to seek out the help the last of the ancient druids. At first, Cormac Kelly thinks it's all a prank or a plastic paddy fantasy, but then Sean's presence in Ireland awakens the mad old sidhe lords, including those thought long dead . . .<br />
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Buy it from <a href="http://ebooks.carinapress.com/1BDCDC16-BD52-45DA-A530-B8676BD2DD18/10/134/en/ContentDetails.htm?ID=%7B89DB7CC1-2E21-4135-93E6-12A17571A2B5%7D">Carina Press</a>.<br />Or how about having it read aloud to you in Ian Ruane's sexy Irish accent? Get the <a href="http://www.audible.com/pd/ref=sr_1_1?asin=B008LUTDFE&qid=1363457538&sr=1-1">Audible</a> version.</blockquote>
<i>Galway Bound</i><br />
Want an Irish hunk without the supernatural trappings? Sean O'Hara and Cormac Kelly are suffering from a slump in their relationship, but luckily a trip to Galway--with bags packed full of bondage toys--may be just what they need to rekindle the sexier side of their romance.<br />
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Buy it (for just 99 cents!) from <a href="https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-galwaybound-946813-145.html">ARe</a>.</blockquote>
<i>Out of the Tombs, Exceedingly Fierce</i><br />
Looking for something free? Canadian photography student Maxwell Lewis travels to Scotland to take some photos of creepy old castles and get over his clingy ex, but nighttime on the moors is no place for a hapless tourist.<br />
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Download it from <a href="http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/110689">Smashwords</a>.</blockquote>
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That's it for me! How about you? Got any Irish-themed recommendations to go with my Guinness?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-217607138934192618.post-78429601600696609802013-03-13T15:23:00.001-07:002013-03-13T16:21:13.667-07:00Announcement: A Surprise Release! <div class="tr_bq">
I've been wanting to do some lighter shortform erotica for awhile now, and a few weeks back, Rachel Haimowitz at Riptide told me they had a gap in their spring schedule so of course I jumped on it. But not before hooking along a new co-writer, <a href="http://ameliacgormley.com/">Amelia C Gormley</a>, for a ride. I knew we were basically soulmates after hearing tell of an upcoming release of hers (an M/M highlander romance, be still my beating heart!), and co-writing this short with her basically sealed the deal.</div>
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It's the first story in what we hope to be a series, all about a romantically dysfunctional and somewhat out of control--but totally consensual--professor/student relationship. The series is called <i>The Professor's Rule</i>, and book one, <a href="http://www.riptidepublishing.com/titles/giving-inch">"Giving an Inch", comes out from Riptide on April 15th</a>. (Pre-orders--and the preceding link--should be going live soon!)<br />
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Here's the blurb:<br />
<blockquote>
History grad James Sheridan thinks his biggest problem in life is trying to find a suitable outfit for his upcoming Ph.D. candidacy exam. That is, until he accidentally texts a changing room selfie meant for his fashionable sister to his ex, the domineering Professor Carson. </blockquote>
<blockquote>
James and Carson haven't seen each other since James fled their power games two years ago. Back in his undergrad days, Carson was his Professor, and not just in the academic sense: a man of unusual tastes and extreme sexual demands, James had been happy to sate Carson's savage appetites. Too happy, in fact. He never could trust himself not to let Carson push too far. </blockquote>
<blockquote>
Now James is older and wiser, and sharing some seriously flirtatious vibes with a cute menswear rep. When Carson replies to James's errant text, ready to pick up where they left off, James can't help being drawn back into Carson's control. It's only when Carson suggests involving the salesman that James has to ask himself how far is too far, and whether he's willing to go there with Carson again.</blockquote>
It's a funny, light, but simultaneously twisty and complex story about domination and submission and boundaries. And there's a cute Indian salesman in a nice suit. ;)<br />
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So, now you know. Cover art and all the rest forthcoming.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00691300421058126528noreply@blogger.com2